Helly Posted May 30, 2008 Report Share Posted May 30, 2008 Morning. I have had 2.5 hours sleep. I'm contemplating not going into work. I found out last night just how little I meant to someone and how very wrong I was to trust them the way I had done. I know it's not me, it's them - but it still hurts like hell. I find trusting no one at all much easier. 98% of people you know will probably prove you right, and the other 2% will care enough about you to understand why you dont trust them and still remain good friends anyway we have a hectic day ahead. I am about to go do tablets for an epileptic lab 2 random facts to start off my day Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jazz Posted May 30, 2008 Report Share Posted May 30, 2008 I don't really know if they are boys toys , I like them ( they are really clever bits of engineering ) and my new job involves building 2 of them ( well not me personally building them ) but I get to see them in as they are being constructed when they are finished standing underneath them and seeing how the steps fold flat is rather fab I do accept that my sense of rather fab is not the same as everyone else's That would make my day mornink xxxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elaine Posted May 30, 2008 Report Share Posted May 30, 2008 I normally don't trust, that's the thing. But this time I decided to let down my guard, this time I believed the claim that I was right to trust. And now I feel so very stupid, like everything was just one big lie and I was too thick to realise it. I have no idea how I'm going to get through work today without dissolving into a sobbing heap. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kathyw Posted May 30, 2008 Report Share Posted May 30, 2008 Elaine. I assume I can trust what people say to be the truth and tend to do so - if my trust is proven to be misguided then I 'vanish' them. They no longer figure in my life, my thoughts, anything. But it doesn't stop me trusting the next potential 'friend'. (Just remembered you hates in quotes Elaine sorry) Himself was sick and as I got up to clean it up, he was eating it and I promptly threw up and some when on his ickle head. I moved him quickly or he would have eaten that too. I am still retching at the thought of it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Red Rotties Posted May 30, 2008 Report Share Posted May 30, 2008 Elaine , Kathys earlier post makes sense http://www.rykat.org/forums/index.php?showtopic=39354 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
supafrisk Posted May 30, 2008 Report Share Posted May 30, 2008 Morning I am still up cos I've got a council inspection at 10am and I'm waiting for the valeters to open so they can scrub the heap out. Somehow I don't think I'm going to get much sleep today Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sanrossscot Posted May 30, 2008 Report Share Posted May 30, 2008 Did I mention I'm not in work today I think I will take my tea & toast back to bed. Elaine Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elaine Posted May 30, 2008 Report Share Posted May 30, 2008 Ro's Dad has just phoned. Ro's been sick in the night - perfect excuse for me not to go to work. And now I feel more awful, because he (Ro's Dad) was so upset that I was upset, and I'm too bloody ashamed to tell him why I feel like this. For all we were shyte as a couple, the temptation to ask if he'd have me back is huge - not because I love him, but because I feel so alone. And at least with him you know what you're getting. How pathetic am I to consider it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wendbert Posted May 30, 2008 Author Report Share Posted May 30, 2008 Not pathetic at all, Elaine After whatever has happened to make you feel like you do, ou're bound to feel the need for something that feels safe and secure Hope Ro is feeling better soon too Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chasta Posted May 30, 2008 Report Share Posted May 30, 2008 I don't want another Dachshund do I? Thank goodness they only home in Wales Nessie? Shes not in Wales shes with 4pawz&more in Kent... still a long way from Redditch tho dont you feel silly when you shout "here blow job" when in public I changed a fosters name when OH couldnt stand up for laughing when I shouted 'VENUS COME' very loudly across the park I'm guessing it's compulsory (either married or not) to have to put up with the wa hey as your oh decides he wants to show you his erm instrument. Err.. yes I think it is, as is the 'Can I weigh your breasts??' Followed by a grab and Wa-hey' Kathy, I hope both you and Himself are feeling better now (No hugs) Elaine Just about to spend 45637 minutes on hold to the Drs... wish me luck Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wendbert Posted May 30, 2008 Author Report Share Posted May 30, 2008 Good luck Chasta Have to go and get weighed soon. Would rather just go to bed though Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jazz Posted May 30, 2008 Report Share Posted May 30, 2008 are you being weighed or just someone weighing your boobs can someone with a cairn or westie let me know the size of a collar and coat please xxxx thank you xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sanrossscot Posted May 30, 2008 Report Share Posted May 30, 2008 can someone with a cairn or westie let me know the size of a collar and coat please xxxxthank you xxx about cairn or westie size I guess sorry! In a silly mood today, me and Tia have been having a 'grunty back rub' session, I luffs my dogs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
owl Posted May 30, 2008 Report Share Posted May 30, 2008 I normally don't trust, that's the thing. But this time I decided to let down my guard, this time I believed the claim that I was right to trust. And now I feel so very stupid, like everything was just one big lie and I was too thick to realise it. I have no idea how I'm going to get through work today without dissolving into a sobbing heap. Elaine, if someone has deliberately deceived you the fault is theirs, so please feel angry rather than stupid. Put blame where it belongs and wash your hands of the whole thing. If this is something in your work situation, it sounds as if there are complicated issues going on there which predated your arrival, so I wouldn't trust anyone as there may be all sorts of personal agendas you have no way of knowing about. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elaine Posted May 30, 2008 Report Share Posted May 30, 2008 No, it's not work. I always keep my distance at work, especially in this place. This is someone who said all the right things, over an extended period, who suckered me and then treated me in the coldest way possible. Someone I loved, and someone I believed loved me. But it was all just an illusion, and it's time for me to face up to that. And it's time to stop making excuses for people who treat me like dirt. I'm working so hard to get myself in a better place, and I know I would never do to anyone what he did to me. Logical, smart side of me knows that it's him with the problem. It's just so hard to admit to yourself that you were so very, very wrong. So I feel stupid, humiliated and used. But I've survived worse, and I'll get over this in time. And maybe there's someone out there who'll love me for who I am. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts