Trallwm farm Posted October 23, 2010 Report Share Posted October 23, 2010 (edited) 2010 has been an up and down year Michelle - I never like to say that a whole year has been bad because one or two incidents have spoiled it. That sort of rules out the rest of the year so you just wait for the next one and hope it is better. You could waste many years doing that, and miss many opportunities. We all cope as best we can when sad/bad things happen, and we need to allow ourselves some crying/grieving/screaming time and then one day we need to wake up and get to a point where we dry our eyes and move on. Not forgetting the person/event that was very sad, but for our own sanity I think if we dwell too long without moving on, it's all too easy to get bogged down in it until you can't find your way out. How long that takes depends on the person and the circumstances, but we are all stronger than we think we are, we just sometimes need someone to show us that. Not meaning to sound callous or uncaring so if that upsets anyone then I'm sorry, but someone gave me that pep talk once and it changed my perspective on a lot of things How spooky. My two sentences appeared in the middle of your whole quote and Ive only just noticed Sound sensible to me. No matter who goes you still have to live. Im tempted by a chinese tonight even though we have food in the house.....hm how bad can I be.... RMF : I have had a bath and am now wondering what to have for tea. A fridge and freezer full of food and I don't fancy any of it Edited October 23, 2010 by Trallwm farm Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spins4me Posted October 23, 2010 Report Share Posted October 23, 2010 2010 has been an up and down year Michelle - I never like to say that a whole year has been bad because one or two incidents have spoiled it. That sort of rules out the rest of the year so you just wait for the next one and hope it is better. You could waste many years doing that, and miss many opportunities. We all cope as best we can when sad/bad things happen, and we need to allow ourselves some crying/grieving/screaming time and then one day we need to wake up and get to a point where we dry our eyes and move on. Not forgetting the person/event that was very sad, but for our own sanity I think if we dwell too long without moving on, it's all too easy to get bogged down in it until you can't find your way out. How long that takes depends on the person and the circumstances, but we are all stronger than we think we are, we just sometimes need someone to show us that. Not meaning to sound callous or uncaring so if that upsets anyone then I'm sorry, but someone gave me that pep talk once and it changed my perspective on a lot of things I agree with almost every bit, Alex. The "need to wake up and get to a point where we move on " has happened to me but more in a "I've woken up one morning and felt that I've moved on" way. Something happened, I don't know what it was, that began to turn things around and made me feel a bit better and more able to cope. I think that the crying/grieving/screaming has to be gone through - anyone going through it now, please just let it happen and know that it will get better. There's a lot of sadness on here at the moment so I'm sending to people who are in need. Hope that things improve for you all. re the rather grim smear test I had - I'm fine now, thanks to everyone who sent advice and good wishes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemstone Posted October 23, 2010 Report Share Posted October 23, 2010 2010 has been an up and down year Michelle - I never like to say that a whole year has been bad because one or two incidents have spoiled it. That sort of rules out the rest of the year so you just wait for the next one and hope it is better. You could waste many years doing that, and miss many opportunities. We all cope as best we can when sad/bad things happen, and we need to allow ourselves some crying/grieving/screaming time and then one day we need to wake up and get to a point where we dry our eyes and move on. Not forgetting the person/event that was very sad, but for our own sanity I think if we dwell too long without moving on, it's all too easy to get bogged down in it until you can't find your way out. How long that takes depends on the person and the circumstances, but we are all stronger than we think we are, we just sometimes need someone to show us that. Wise words I am really tired today, I slept in the car on the way back from visiting my mum and dad Good job I wasnt driving Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
houndzrus Posted October 23, 2010 Report Share Posted October 23, 2010 For all lurgified people. For Mummyowl. We all have to go at some point so all we can do is make the best of things and look after those that are still here. I never like to say that a whole year has been bad because one or two incidents have spoiled it. That sort of rules out the rest of the year so you just wait for the next one and hope it is better. You could waste many years doing that, and miss many opportunities. Yes, it may take a long time, but we really have no choice but to carry on, albeit with a slightly altered world around us. I have been a busy bee today. So far, two shepherd's pies, (one for tomorrow)one loaf of bread and a huge apple crumble "mountain", which I hope will flatten as it cooks! Sandwiches are made in readiness for a trip to Rutland Water tomorrow, for a good walk by the water in the fresh air. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karen Posted October 23, 2010 Report Share Posted October 23, 2010 I have joined the poorly parent club. Mummy Owl didn't seem right yesterday after a hospital appointment but swore she was just tired. Hope Mummy Owl is sorted out by the doctor and is feeling a bit more "right" soon. 2010 has been an up and down year Michelle - I never like to say that a whole year has been bad because one or two incidents have spoiled it. That sort of rules out the rest of the year so you just wait for the next one and hope it is better. You could waste many years doing that, and miss many opportunities. I have to agree too. I also make a point of not noting dates of bad things (like pets dying) after having seen OH's mother do massive gloomy periods leading up to anniversary dates. Also having seen the large number of people in intensive care this last week, I've realised how many other people have very poorly friends and family all the time. I'm not explaining it very well! I think what I mean is that although there are bad things going on somewhere all the time there are also good things happening all the time too and you can't write the good things off. Sorry I don't usally waffle this much! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trallwm farm Posted October 23, 2010 Report Share Posted October 23, 2010 (edited) AGHHHHH Its still happening to me I was dissapearing into mad merles quote like I was in a time warp Edited October 23, 2010 by Trallwm farm Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
owl Posted October 23, 2010 Report Share Posted October 23, 2010 That is true, Karen, we need to remember that the good things are still happening to pull us through the rest of it. Mummy Owl is on ABs, cough medicine and steroids. She did admit to the doctor that she wasn't feeling all that well and had a bit of a cough. She has in fact got a chest infection, which she seems to have passed on to me who can't take ABs so am glugging back plenty of liquorice tea and honey. If she hasn't got over it in 3 days she is to see the doc again. I don't think I have immunity to English bugs, but at least I am in a dry house now. I have joined Facebook because people keep sending me links which I can only access if I join. Please can someone tell me how everyone else has time to do Facebook, Twitter, emails, rescue work/lost dogs, watch TV, do housework and cooking, walk/train dogs, earn a living and have a social life plus have a partner/relationship and/or children in just 24 hrs a day and still get some sleep? I have dispensed with TV, relationships, social life, Twitter and am retired (joke!)but am still overwhelmed by stuff, mostly dog-related. Probably everyone else is doing everything 3 times as fast as I am. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotslass Posted October 23, 2010 Report Share Posted October 23, 2010 I have to agree too. I also make a point of not noting dates of bad things (like pets dying) after having seen OH's mother do massive gloomy periods leading up to anniversary dates. Also having seen the large number of people in intensive care this last week, I've realised how many other people have very poorly friends and family all the time. I'm not explaining it very well! I think what I mean is that although there are bad things going on somewhere all the time there are also good things happening all the time too and you can't write the good things off. I think that's a very positive approach. I have an elderly neighbour up north who catalogues every miserable/gloomy/depressing incident in her life - and frequently, in her friends' lives. As she is now 90, this means she always has something to feel unhappy about...this, despite a supportive family, good friends and reliable neighbours. She's just a negative person - I've known her for 30 years and she's never been the sort to see the best in people or situations. She thinks the world is going to pot, she hates the way society is changing, she doesn't like animals or small children - nothing seems to bring her joy. I dread visiting her; it's a litany of dismal anniversaries. I have joined Facebook because people keep sending me links which I can only access if I join. Please can someone tell me how everyone else has time to do Facebook, Twitter, emails, rescue work/lost dogs, watch TV, do housework and cooking, walk/train dogs, earn a living and have a social life plus have a partner/relationship and/or children in just 24 hrs a day and still get some sleep? They don't. There are things on your list which other people wouldn't dream of doing - I suspect your busy life is not the norm. I joined Facebook too - mostly to share photos with my extended family - but it's often another source of misery and negativity. There are Facebook users whose posts I dread reading; they're so negative about everyone and everything. I'd rather walk my dog, read my books and talk to people who find things to laugh about - life is hard enough. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
merledogs Posted October 24, 2010 Author Report Share Posted October 24, 2010 (edited) I was dissapearing into mad merles quote like I was in a time warp There there Lesley, keep taking the tablets Karen - still thinking of your family and sending lots of positive thoughts I think that's a very positive approach. I have an elderly neighbour up north who catalogues every miserable/gloomy/depressing incident in her life - and frequently, in her friends' lives. As she is now 90, this means she always has something to feel unhappy about...this, despite a supportive family, good friends and reliable neighbours. She's just a negative person - I've known her for 30 years and she's never been the sort to see the best in people or situations. She thinks the world is going to pot, she hates the way society is changing, she doesn't like animals or small children - nothing seems to bring her joy. I dread visiting her; it's a litany of dismal anniversaries. What a dreadfully sad existence I joined Facebook too - mostly to share photos with my extended family - but it's often another source of misery and negativity. There are Facebook users whose posts I dread reading; they're so negative about everyone and everything. I'd rather walk my dog, read my books and talk to people who find things to laugh about - life is hard enough. I tend to hide those people on the feed so I don't have to read it Morning It's dark and cold and I want to be living in a house in the country with wood burning stoves and a huge farmhouse kitchen/dining area and a cozy snug where me and the dogs can snuggle up when it's cold outside. Edited October 24, 2010 by merledogs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JulesB Posted October 24, 2010 Report Share Posted October 24, 2010 Morning Thank you for all the good wishes for my mum, she's out of hospital now and feeling good so i am very And we had baby granddaughter for the evening last night and she was a little poppet so I am double Lots of RMF to read through since Thursday but the main thing is a big massive to poorly people and their poorly mums/family. I hope everyone is feeling better soon. It's chucking it down here but I am going to get some fresh air and see if beloved pony wants to come out for a ride. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karen Posted October 24, 2010 Report Share Posted October 24, 2010 I have joined Facebook because people keep sending me links which I can only access if I join. Please can someone tell me how everyone else has time to do Facebook, Twitter, emails, rescue work/lost dogs, watch TV, do housework and cooking, walk/train dogs, earn a living and have a social life plus have a partner/relationship and/or children in just 24 hrs a day and still get some sleep? I have dispensed with TV, relationships, social life, Twitter and am retired (joke!)but am still overwhelmed by stuff, mostly dog-related. Probably everyone else is doing everything 3 times as fast as I am. Hope that you can shake off the bug - a bit more rest might help you! I don't do Facebook as I thought that if it turned out to be addictive then I would have no time at all. I do use Twitter a bit to monitor a few things but I don't tweet myself. I do care for my pets (I've given back my fosters for the moment) and just about earn a living but I don't often watch tv, I'm not very good at keeping up with the hoovering etc and I don't have children. So I suspect that the rest of us aren't faster than you, we just cut other things out! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jazz Posted October 24, 2010 Report Share Posted October 24, 2010 ive got a visitor .... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
houndzrus Posted October 24, 2010 Report Share Posted October 24, 2010 Glad mummy owl is on AB's but sorry you've got the lurgy now Owl. I can't keep up with Facebook these days and have also hidden a few people. spill the beans Jazz! Morning all Well, so much for getting up and going out. i took some quiet life tablets before going to sleep and have not long woken up! I'm not fussed about going now, Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
houndzrus Posted October 24, 2010 Report Share Posted October 24, 2010 Spins, have some I seem to have missed your posts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
houndzrus Posted October 24, 2010 Report Share Posted October 24, 2010 Decided to join the Cov Greyhound group walk at Bedworth park instead of going to Rutland water. I think a lot of people are going and it's not too far from home which is a bonus. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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