Do You Open Your Partners Letters?

[Kathyw]

I was taught you never open anything that doesn't have your name on it.

I was given my first letter, from a penfriend organised by my school, unopened.

The only time I ever opened someone else's mail was when Ray was working - I wasn't happy about it but he said it might be something that needed dealing with immediately, so I did open his mail but never when he was not at work.

Since he stopped work, I give him his mail unopened when I get pick it up.

 

It is causing a problem now as letters have come here, Ray has opened them whilst sitting outside having a ciggie and as I just found out, put one back in the envelopeand then back into the fireproof container thingy. I then asked if any other letters had come that I needed to know about. Yes quite a few that he put in his medical letters file.

 

Ray said 'If I give you all the mail and you open it, then this won't happen again'.

 

1. If he remembers to give the mail to me

2. It really goes against the grain for me to open mail not addressed to me.

 

Do you open letters not addressed to you?

 

With all the trouble I have with the post, I think I must have been a very bad postman in the past.

[ranirottie]

I open mine and anything addressed to both of us but not if its just addressed to Chris. I wouldn't like it if he opened my mail. x

[mooandboo]

OH and I open each others mail, we have no problem with it. I open all of his when he's away & if he gets the mail first when he's here he knows I don't mind if he opens anything addressed to me, as long as he lets me know it's there.

[ReikiAnge]

We open each other's mail at times. If one of us is away (usually him these days) then we'll open anything that looks vaguely interesting/urgent and tell the other over the phone what it is. I deal with some of Rob's post too - the important stuff he's likely to forget like road tax, paying tax bills etc - so it's easier for me to open it and keep it somewhere safe.

 

He tends not to open mine so much as I'm usually here/he has no need to.

 

We don't really get any personal post that's worth being nosey about though

[snow]

The vast majority of the time I open pretty much all post that comes here whether addressed to me or to hubby I don't tend to open anything that looks like a personal letter or card but I do let him know theres something here like that for him and more often than not he'll say open it for me and tell me whats in it.

[yena]

I open my OH's mail, same as he opens mine. I also will open my sons mail, if they are away. We will also ask our sons to open our mail too.

[Melp]

We've always opened each others mail though it tends only to be if somethng looks important/urgent. Bills look like bills and come addressed to him [not for much longer] and I don't open those because everything is paid by direct debit.

I don't know if he'd open a handwritten letter or not. We don't open each others birthday cards though [mainly because we don't get any ]

[Jacobean]

I've asked Martyn to open my post when I've not been here or haven't been well. He opens most of his post but it all gets flung everywhere. I have a filing system for all of our paperwork. Need to have with 2 sets of bills etc. So I do end up seeing all of his post eventually as it's muggins (me) that ends up filing it all away.

[blackmagic]

Like you Kathy I was brought up not to open anybody else's mail.

 

Neither of us open the other's mail unless they ask us to.

 

In your case, since Ray has asked you to open it, I would do so.

 

Alternatively, you could give him the mail to open,but stay with him as he does, so that he can then give you the letter to read.

[Spins4me]

No, never. We only open our own and OH opens stuff in joint names because I'm not v good at dealing with official stuff these days (joint letters are usually bank, insurance -type things). He'll show them to me if I ask but knows that usually I'm not bothered.

[murtle]

I think the days of not opening others mail was when the mail brought more then just the usual bills, junk mail, hospital appointments!!

 

Who ever is the unlucky one gets to open the mail here (unless it's birthday's then we can usually guess those ones)! However, its usually me, as I get to then file it, or make a note on the calendar! Unless of course it's parcels cause they are exciting, OH opens his cause he wouldn't wait for me to get home, but doesnt' usually open mine cause he dreads to think what I might have been buying....

 

Personal emails, other half knows my passwords etc and can have full access to them, but we're not that interested...I'll tell him or forward things on to him so he knows/can laugh what ever.

[cycas]

My post is boring enough, I definitely don't want to open Mark's as well, although I would do if he asked me and had a good reason to, I suppose.

 

Though we have now made a rule that both of us must open the post at least once a week, after Mark left his to form a snowdrift for about 3 months and ended up with an extra bill for the council tax because he'd forgotten to pay it (and they don't phone or email to tell you, they just send increasingly irate letters. Which he didn't open!)

 

Also I have noticed that leaving your post to make a snowdrift annoys the postman and makes him stamp and grump in the porch. He felt we weren't taking his work seriously!

[ReikiAnge]

Like you Kathy I was brought up not to open anybody else's mail.

 

Oh I was too - and I've never had reason to open anyone else's mail, but Rob and I opening each other's mail is just something we've done/agreed upon together, tis nowt sneaky about it.

 

If we're both here, we usually open our own, although if it's something important I will nab it before he loses it Parcels are opened by whoever they're addressed to as mine are usually dog-related and his are usually music-related. Birthday cards of course we open ourselves

 

We once didn't open a load of statements from an old bank account that we'd not used for years, because we'd not used it for years. Eventually we did open one to find we had actually gone very slightly overdrawn at one point, not realising anything had come out, and had then had charge upon charge up to several hundred pounds For some reason unknown to us the bank then decided after quite some time of charges, to refund all the charges and issue us with an apology which was blimmin fantastic I must say and taught me to open things in future!

[jacqui d]

I open hubs and he opens mine, depends who gets tot he post box first, but we never open the kids mail

[zoe]

I only open my OHs post if he asks me to and I know he's the same. I would feel terrible just opening it without him asking, I don't really like doing it even when he does ask!