owl Posted April 4, 2013 Report Share Posted April 4, 2013 Just got back from Doncaster. Things are not good. Mum is mobile and eating, but totally demented in a way I have never seen her before. Spend 2 minutes with her and asked to see a doctor. They got me the consultant 10 minutes later. He is baffled. The brain scans don't show a stroke, though they don't pick up mini strokes. They are having to watch her all the time as she tried to beetle off at speed on her zimmer as she needed to go and look after her mum and I had to explain that Grandma was no longer with us. She was very upset to hear that. Then she was suddenly happy because she had passed an interview to go on a special course of study. She seems to be stuck somewhere about 35 years ago, but at the same time she knows she is 93. Her brain has got totally messed up. I couldn't stay as long as I wanted because my presence got her worked up and she wouldn't settle while I was there. Sorry haven't read back, will catch up but right now my head is in a whirl. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
murtle Posted April 4, 2013 Report Share Posted April 4, 2013 Huge hugs Owl. x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
suzeanna Posted April 4, 2013 Report Share Posted April 4, 2013 Oh Phebe...so sorry, this sounds very frightening for you, but ....possibly...not for your mum, unless she is anxious that people who no longer are on this earth aren't coming to see her. It certainly sounds as if the wiring in her brain has become totally scrambled, hopefully it will get back to normal soon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gooster Posted April 4, 2013 Report Share Posted April 4, 2013 :grouphug: Owl Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whizzie Posted April 4, 2013 Report Share Posted April 4, 2013 How distressing for you Owl. I hope things with you Mum improve Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
griff Posted April 4, 2013 Report Share Posted April 4, 2013 sorry to hear that Owl, good thoughts being sent yours and your mums way Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
owl Posted April 4, 2013 Report Share Posted April 4, 2013 Thanks everyone x 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
merledogs Posted April 5, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 5, 2013 Moaning Sending lots of positive thoughts for owl and mummy owl I spent an hour watering all the plants last night because we haven't had rain for weeks and weeks. Just hope it flippin' warms up soon because I have tons of new plants to plant out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Loo Posted April 5, 2013 Report Share Posted April 5, 2013 Morning!! I think its a little warmer today because it's raining instead of snow or frosty blue skys! My garden seriously needs attention.....this time last year it was neat and tidy with lots of pots simmering full of seedlings... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buddyboy Posted April 5, 2013 Report Share Posted April 5, 2013 Phebe - my dad lived here for 3 months last year while mum was ill. He has Alzheimers and happily tells people his memory is shot but he does join in general conversations and makes sense. A couple of times though he did ask how his parents were - he was 91 while he was here - and when I told him they had died many years ago he accepted it. One episode that did upset me (not so much at what he was asking but that he could not remember) was when we went to pick some stuff up from friends. We had all sat in their kitchen chatting normally and having coffee when he turned to me and asked if he had any children. When I told him I am his daughter he was very apologetic that he could not remember me, when I said about my brother he remembered him - but then on the way home it was obvious he still thought I was someone who had just taken him out for a drive as he was telling me about his family. Next day he knew who I am but that really brought home to me how the disease can affect someone - I have seen plenty of people with dementia and Alzheimers as when he was first diagnosed I made a point of visiting a residential home for them with the PAT dogs, but when it is actually a member of your family you realise that knowing about it and then being involved at first hand is different. We are lucky he has always been a gentle man as some people can become violent but the worst it gets is when mum winds him up and he just snaps back (and she has always pushed pushed pushed until people snap). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yantan Posted April 5, 2013 Report Share Posted April 5, 2013 Owl I am thinking of you and mummy Owl Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
owl Posted April 5, 2013 Report Share Posted April 5, 2013 buddyboy, I looked after a lot of people with dementia both in care homes and in their own homes. It does vary from one day to the next but not to the extreme I have seen with mum. There is definitely something physically wrong with her as well but no one can work out what it is. She will be in hospital for a while yet until they can work out how to treat her. One thing I am clear about is that I am fine about moving in with her to cover the nights if she has only mild confusion, but if she continues as bad as she was yesterday she will need 24 waking care for her own protection. If that is the case I want her to go into residential care in Worksop, hopefully at a very good place I know. I am not dealing with someone with severe dementia who is very agitated and pretty mobile. I have done overnights and 10 hour shifts with a lady like that in the past when I was 10 years younger, and it was very draining. I have also seen family members made ill by trying to cope. After a certain point in dementia, people are best off being cared for by a team but with regular visits from family. I have always believed this. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
murtle Posted April 5, 2013 Report Share Posted April 5, 2013 Owl, I think you sound incredibly strong as a person and so accurate on people getting the care they need, both for those suffering and the family supporting. I am glad to hear you know of a nice residential home for your mum as I think that can be a really hard thing to source when under pressure. xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
griff Posted April 5, 2013 Report Share Posted April 5, 2013 Owl, i think you are quite right, if your mum is going to continue in the way that she is then for the both of your sakes residential care would perhaps be for the best... it is lovely that you know of somewhere decent, i know when we had that thought about my nan i was really worried about it. i had some good news today............ the consultant thinks i am in remission!!!!!!!!!!!! how long it will last this time i don't know but he seemed happy enough, he didn't tell me why i felt sick, tired , cold and breathless all the time or why my joints were hurting again, i do have blood and protein in my urine again and he was very concerned about my bad knee as it is very very swollen but i fibbed and said it is always that swollen...last thing i want is more surgery! bonus is i get to have my blood taken once a month instead of fortnightly!!!! 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
merledogs Posted April 5, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 5, 2013 Great news griffalo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts