riley Posted February 19, 2009 Report Share Posted February 19, 2009 Never having been one to hold back *ahem*, we (Jack, Riley and I) were walking yesterday, a lady came up behind us and as Jack was dawdling along in the middle of the path I took hime to one side with the words "JJ, we need to be aware of what's around us and move to the side so that the ady can come past us" Which he did and we watched as she went past, WITHOUT A WORD! Not even a smile in acknowledgement. So I may just have said rather loudly after her..... Thank you, it's a pleasure, how on earth you expet children to learn manners when as an adult you can't exhibit them yourself is beyond me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rufus the wonderdog Posted February 19, 2009 Report Share Posted February 19, 2009 Good for you Amanda Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ReikiAnge Posted February 19, 2009 Report Share Posted February 19, 2009 Yes, good for you. I pulled my dogs back off the pavement onto a bit of grass not long ago so a jogger could get by - it was totally obvious that I had waited but he didn't say a word as he went by so I said "you're welcome" as he passed and he still kept quiet so I told him a thank you wouldn't have gone amiss Rudeness! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brenda Posted February 19, 2009 Report Share Posted February 19, 2009 Well done you, a "thank-you" costs nothing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tisaann Posted February 19, 2009 Report Share Posted February 19, 2009 I agree. There are some dreadfully rude people out there. I work for a mail order company and have to speak to a huge amount of callers during the during the day and I would say that at least 35% of those callers have no manners what so ever. My main bug bear on the phone is when someone doesn't hear what I have said so say's 'what' instead of pardon and also those who you have helped who just put the phone down without saying 'thank you or goodbye' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ailsas mum Posted February 20, 2009 Report Share Posted February 20, 2009 "you're welcome" That's what I say, mind you I'm usually gob smacked when someone does say thank you, I have also been known to let a door go if the person I'm holding it open for say's nothing, can't imagine why I get a dirty look from them when it hits them. Terri Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cycas Posted February 20, 2009 Report Share Posted February 20, 2009 I'd just like to suggest that people who do not acknowledge that you have stepped out of their path - could be losing their eyesight - could be preoccupied because they are recently bereaved or seriously ill - could have had a really bad experience with someone that looks like you and are having problems dealing with it (for example: to the OP and her toddler: perhaps this lady had lost a small child in her family and was at that stage where seeing other small children is still very painful) The same applies to people on the telephone: it someone doesn't hear you the first time, they may well be struggling with loss of hearing, or perhaps they are craning to check that their child hasn't pulled a bookshelf on top of themselves or that their dog hasn't just been sick, and not putting all their concentration into the call for that reason. Or perhaps they had an awful start in life and nobody has ever actually explained to them that 'what' is a bit abrupt. To my mind, manners also involves trying to assume the best about other people. You could be wrong, but it does no harm, it is a good deal better for your blood pressure, and surprisingly often, you get pleasantly surprised. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ReikiAnge Posted February 20, 2009 Report Share Posted February 20, 2009 Well the jogger most definitely saw us. Appreciate what you are saying Victoria, but some people are just plain rude. The vast majority of people we meet and step back for - quite often cars on a quieter road with no pavement, sometimes a horse and rider - are very polite and smile/wave thanks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Helly Posted February 20, 2009 Report Share Posted February 20, 2009 I have a tendancy to get a tad annoyed at 'older people', the silver tops who expect a door to be held and waltz through without a thanks. I do tend to loudly shout ' you are very welcome' followed by ' the old of today have no manners' Respect is earned not assumed and a thank you or a smile costs nothing at all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yantan Posted February 20, 2009 Report Share Posted February 20, 2009 What gets me is the number of drivers who fail to acknowledge you when you stop to let them thro. I always shout "that's OK don't mention it - oh you didn't" tho unless it's summer and we all have windows down I doubt they ever hear I always say thank you and smile if someone holds a door for me or stands to one side to let me thro. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cycas Posted February 20, 2009 Report Share Posted February 20, 2009 Well the jogger most definitely saw us. Appreciate what you are saying Victoria, but some people are just plain rude. But how do you know that the jogger was not, for example, severely dog phobic? Some people have real problems just walking past a dog and need to concentrate their whole mind on something else in order to be able to do so calmly. Seems to me that there is no way that one can understand the stresses that a stranger is under, the awful things that might be going on in their life that might add up to one day failing to smile at some random person who lets them pass. They might be rude, or they might be going through something pretty awful and be having problems coping, and it can be really hard to tell the difference. I am not confident enough of my own behaviour under stress to say that I would/ always have, always, always thanked someone for the opened door or the extra pavement space, no matter what - so I kind of think - who am I to hold them to standards that I can't keep to myself? I'm not saying that don't take offence or grump at someone who has grumped at me as that would be vastly untrue! But honestly, I believe that life is much better for everyone if you try to keep in mind that the stranger coming the other way could have low blood sugar, an ulcer, and be racing to the birth of his firstborn son. If you are lucky enough to be well-fed, comfortable, not in a rush or in need of the loo, why not freely give a smile or an open door and not expect any thanks? Even if they don't thank you, maybe you made their day a bit better. Maybe the next person they meet will get a smile instead, because you didn't grouch or make them feel bad? And even if not, there you are, a gorgeous happy Fugee, and there they are, a grumpy old fart: you are already way ahead of them, so why make their grotty day even worse by commenting on it? That sounds extremely hippyish and a bit wet, but I do feel quite strongly about it. Mark would laugh so much if he read this, but thing is, I'm naturally such a git that if I didn't work on making allowances all the time probably some sort of chainsaw massacre would occur quite quickly... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ReikiAnge Posted February 20, 2009 Report Share Posted February 20, 2009 If the jogger had been severely dog phobic, he could have crossed to the other side of the road. I wouldn't imagine someone with a huge fear of dogs would choose to come jogging right past them when they were so obviously there. We'll have to agree to disagree. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laurel n Hardy Posted February 20, 2009 Report Share Posted February 20, 2009 I have a tendancy to get a tad annoyed at 'older people', the silver tops who expect a door to be held and waltz through without a thanks. I do tend to loudly shout ' you are very welcome' followed by ' the old of today have no manners' Respect is earned not assumed and a thank you or a smile costs nothing at all. totally agree with Di (must be the aquarian in us - we're all b'stards dontcha know ) What gets me is the number of drivers who fail to acknowledge you when you stop to let them thro. I always shout "that's OK don't mention it - oh you didn't" tho unless it's summer and we all have windows down I doubt they ever hear I always say thank you and smile if someone holds a door for me or stands to one side to let me thro. Marion, I use those exact words - LOUDLY. it works quite well in a crowded shop as everyone looks round but also on the pavement when I move my lot out of the way, and the majority are old gits too (me PC!!, b*lls to all that) never tried it with a driver, i just point skywards with one of my fingers, have a guess which Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BillyMalc Posted February 20, 2009 Report Share Posted February 20, 2009 I'm afraid I'm not very flexible either, when it comes to making allowances for other people's lack of manners - obviously someone who is clearly distressed will have something else on their minds, but in general just acknowledging that you're keeping your dogs wih you and out of people's way I think is not too much to ask. I'm one of those as well who will loudly say "you're welcome - I won't bother next time!" when people can't be asked to say thank you, or smile or at least nod when I show common courtesy. It goes both ways Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yantan Posted February 20, 2009 Report Share Posted February 20, 2009 How about this for an example of bad manners/grumpiness. Ruby took Archie for a walk the other day along with my aunt and her dog and another one she was minding for a friend. Now my aunt is a really, really nice lady and always sees the good in other people. She will go out her way to help folk and always has a smile and a cheery "hello" for people as they pass when she is out walking. Anyway she was bending down putting leads on her 2 charges and failed to see a nun coming along the pathway. Ruby pointed out to my aunt that the nun was waiting to come past and my aunt hurriedly got the dogs sorted and apologised to the nun for holding her up. The nun did not acknowledge my aunt, just pursed her lips and with a real sour look on her face carried on with a "hhhhhrrrrrmmp" as she passed Ruby. Ruby called after her "and a very merry Christmas to you too Sister". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts