rufus the wonderdog Posted January 1, 2009 Report Share Posted January 1, 2009 No further advice to offer at the moment but please have a Things will work out - and you do have lots of friends to support you (even if some of us are in cyberspace) - you are not on your own. Please feel free to whinge, cry, moan, ask for advice or a hug as you need to Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lazydaisy Posted January 1, 2009 Report Share Posted January 1, 2009 be kind to yourself and dont push yourself, do things when you are able to. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ranirottie Posted January 1, 2009 Report Share Posted January 1, 2009 for you and hope it all works out for you x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clare Posted January 2, 2009 Author Report Share Posted January 2, 2009 Thank you all for your kind words, I really do appreciate all the support I think I have found a second job and it will bring in an extra £100 a month which is a relief Not so sure on the sharer yet, she is coming back for a second "interview" tomorrow, as tempted as I am to grab the first person, I know it will cause me problems down the line if I am not 100% sure I have the right person, trouble is she is the only person at the moment I think I am going to try Murf on CSJ Loan has been agreed and all ready for me to sign on Monday. A lady at the stables was about to arrange to put her furniture into storage, and has offered me whatever furniture I need, so I won't be sleeping on the floor or sitting on a beanbag after all I am getting there Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotslass Posted January 2, 2009 Report Share Posted January 2, 2009 That sounds like real progress already - well done! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dirtychicken Posted January 2, 2009 Report Share Posted January 2, 2009 Blimey Clare You have been a busy girl (you were very nearly a busty girl then ) and good on you for trying so hard and sorting so much out already Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs B Posted January 3, 2009 Report Share Posted January 3, 2009 So sorry to hear that all has been going so sadly for you - I've been "watching" from the sidelines and have been amazed at just how positively you have been dealing with this all. I hope that things continue to work out for you - but remember that there will always be folks here for you if things take a more difficult turn for you - no matter how big or small the problem - just keep talking. I'll reiterate what a couple of others have mentioned about checking out moneysavingexpert.com - it really is an amazing source of information on all things financial - from savings to spendings big and small. I would also say that I find it one of the most daunting places to navigate around to find stuff, but that's mainly 'cause there is just so much information! Re the internet. I know that Helly's said something about this already - my experience was with AOL some time ago when I was on dial up at £7.99 a month and wanted to swap to broadband but couldn't see a good deal with them - I just had a quick look around at who was doing the best introductory deal, rang up AOL, suggested I was thinking of moving - and they offered me broadband, modem and everything for £9.99 a month - and it's stayed that way ever since (a few years now). If you want more info on that, let me know. Glad you have Murf for company - I can imagine how much comfort he will bring. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clare Posted January 26, 2009 Author Report Share Posted January 26, 2009 Sorry me again I could really use some Fugee advise please Ex is still living at home, although he comes and goes at really odd times of day and night On Saturday when I did the washing a couple of notes fell out, obviously from a girl well a girlfriend. He swore they weren't his (he must have anothe mate with the same name that I have never heard of ) I let it pass as he is leaving at the end of Feb and at the end of the day we are both single now so why make a fuss. Today I have had a couple of texts accusing me of seeing other men, I wish One of which involved him rumaging through my bedside cabinet (looking for nail files apparantly) Anyhow to cut a long story short, I got home for lunch and found a letter from his estate agents for the place he is moving into, it was addressed to him and a Ms somebodyother I sent him a raging text and he says that he has been meaning to tell me but didn't know how he is not seeing anyone else it is just a friend who he is housesharing with (he had told me he was sharing with his brother and still sticks to that but I am sure it isn't a three bed house. But why was it addressed to both of them at this address. My head is spinning like crazy I have asked him to move out immediately He says he has no where to go and has done nothing wrong but will move out if I insist. I don't know what to do, every inch of me wants him to leave but am I over reacting if he has no where to go, there is also the financial side, I could do it but would make things very stretched. I never want to see him again Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sherlock Bones Posted January 26, 2009 Report Share Posted January 26, 2009 Personally, I'd let him go. You don't need any more heartache and you don't need to spend another month in tense hatred of each other, suspecting who is doing what. You have a new life and you're getting on with it - now stand up for yourself and insist he does the same Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ruthi (borrowadog) Posted January 26, 2009 Report Share Posted January 26, 2009 People do behave badly when relationships end. Even the ones we thought were decent! I'd be pretty sure she's the reason he's moving out too! Or else he's been a pretty quick worker!! And it doesn't really matter whether he's telling the truth. If you never want to see him again tell him to go. He can sleep on someone's floor in the interim. Clare, keep your faith. This is the worst bit of the process, it will get better, you will meet someone more worthy of you, the sun will shine! Ruth Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ranirottie Posted January 26, 2009 Report Share Posted January 26, 2009 pack his bags,change the locks and tell him to move his stuff asap. A reasonably amicable parting is one thing but rubbing your nose in his betrayal is another !! Tell him to shift himself,you don't need another month of upset. x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clare Posted January 27, 2009 Author Report Share Posted January 27, 2009 Thank you I read the posts on here and told him to get out, which he agreed to. I then got home and found him sobbing and booking himself into hotels for the next month and a bit as he had no where to go, which made me cry I know I am probably being an easy touch but I said he could stay for the month, but no more games or secrets otherwise he will have to get out. He is still adamant that it is soley a house share, and now she has pulled out anyway, oh and they are going for a drink tonight for her to explain why To be honest it is just as much a financial decision for me as anything, my second job has ended as the people I was working for fell out with management and upped and left, and the lady that is sharing my horse is now not willing to travel to the new yard when I move on the 15th so I really need his money during Feb to buy me time to get those things sorted I wish I could fast forward six months, I am sure things will be much better then Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
safneo Posted January 27, 2009 Report Share Posted January 27, 2009 You have to do what is right for YOU Clare. And this sounds like a good solution financially bearing in mind the other bad news that you have had. I hope you can get sorted as quickly as you did last time. Something will turn up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ReikiAnge Posted January 27, 2009 Report Share Posted January 27, 2009 I wish I could fast forward six months, I am sure things will be much better then They will be Keep holding onto that thought Life likes to challenge us at times but you will be ok. Well done on sorting so much stuff out already, you will look back on this sometime in the not too distant future and realise how far you've come Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ranirottie Posted January 27, 2009 Report Share Posted January 27, 2009 try to detatch your feelings from him and see it as just a house share,hard I know,but it will help you to get through it. Betrayal cuts deep and takes a long time to heal inside. Good luck, x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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