Kids And Helping Round The House

[safneo]

My daughter is 14 and a half. She does very little round the house. Sorts out the dishwasher when she gets home from school (often after I get in from work at 5.30 and remind her) She does help by coming home at lunch times to let the dogs out for a wee, which she gets £5 a week for. Her room is an absolute pigsty and her clothes are appalling. I refuse to do ironing for her anymore as I used to hand it to her to hang up and it would go straight on the floor and end up back in the washing basket a couple of weeks later. Usually when I had just cleared the last of the washing. I even bought her, her own washing basket to put in her room at her request but that didnt work either. She has been wearing clothes that are creased and crumpled and looks like a tramp even though I keep telling she is not going out in them in that state. She just leaves the house in the morning when I am in the shower or at the last second so I dont have time to deal with it. I know these are only trivial things but there are a wholel host of other things too.

 

So what do your kids do around the house, how old are they, and do they get pocket money for it?

[dirtychicken]

Please excuse any smugness that may come across in this post - it's not intentional, but I am dead proud of my kids

 

Ever since my kids have been in beds, they've been expected to make them. Ever since they could dress themselves, they've done it. Ever since they could make a mess, they've been expected to tidy it up behind themselves.

 

Now: they are responsible for keeping their rooms and computer desks tidy - and they always are; they are about to get back into the swing of washing and drying their own clothes (temporary break in that routine thanks to moving); they don't iron because we don't *do* ironing; they always take their plates, etc out to the sink when they've finished eating; they get their own breakfasts; they always tidy up behind themselves if they've had "messy" toys (Lego, hama beads, etc) out; they always tidy away any unfinished drinks, books, magazines, etc from the lounge at the end of the day; they don't have to do "housework" as such as a rule, but if we need to do a general tidy/clean up then they will always select a fair number of jobs from the list and do them without complaint.

 

For this, they get no pocket money. Well. They get £2 a week each paid into their banks, but that's not as payment for the chores.

 

Jacob is 12. Sophie is 9.

 

They do this because we are a unit. We all have to live here. I don't expect them to tidy up my mess, they don't expect me to tidy up their's. They also know that if they help with the chores on Tidy Up Day then we will be finished quicker and they will have me to play with much quicker than if I have to do it all on my own

[Gemstone]

So what do your kids do around the house,

 

Not much

 

how old are they,

 

14, 12 and 6.

 

and do they get pocket money for it?

 

 

Matty will do chores for 25p a go (eg. Empty the dishwasher) but only if he is saving for something he really wants and that is not very often I also give them pocket money for practising the piano and things like that but their grandad gives them money for nothing so they see what they can get from him instead

[Gemstone]

So what do your OH do around the house,

 

Cuts the meat on a Sunday

 

how old are they,

 

40

 

, and do they get pocket money for it?

 

 

No But we sometimes go to bed early

 

 

 

Sarah, one of my friends has kids that are home educated and they are good at doing chores too When the children were little, they came round to play and she was telling me how good they are at doing chores like washing and stuff and me and my boys were gobsmacked by how good they were. When it was time to go, I said "Right-oh! Tidy up time!" My son Adam said "It's ok, they will do it, they are really good at doing chores"

[dirtychicken]

Sarah, one of my friends has kids that are home educated and they are good at doing chores too When the children were little, they came round to play and she was telling me how good they are at doing chores like washing and stuff and me and my boys were gobsmacked by how good they were. When it was time to go, I said "Right-oh! Tidy up time!" My son Adam said "It's ok, they will do it, they are really good at doing chores"

I think it's fairly common knowledge now that Sophie has an absurd love of cleaning - without her no dusting would ever get done here As soon as people realise just how much she loves cleaning, she becomes in very high demand but she won't leave me because I'd "drown in squalor"

[phoebejo]

Molly (aged 9) keeps her bedroom immaculate. She's only been in it a few months, previously shared a pigsty with Emily (6) and her new room is newly decorated with all new furniture. It's her pride and joy I hope it lasts forever but I doubt it Emilys room is a mess and so is Daisys (almost 11), despite Daisys just recently been decorated & with new furniture too

 

Molly is good at putting her dirty clothes in the washing basket (we have one upstairs and one downstairs in the hope of making things easier for them) but Daisy & Emily are complete strangers to the baskets

 

Daisy is a good cook and she's happy to help out with dinner or making breakfast for her sisters.

 

They'll tidy up but will whinge constantly, bicker with each other and often resort to violence They're carp at hoovering but will give it a go and Daisy can wash the floors as long as I'm there to make sure she does it properly.

 

Emily loves cleaning the fronts of the cupboards in the kitchen. Give her a bucket and some cloths and she'll be entertained for ages

 

They're useless at loading or unloading the dishwasher but will collect dirty washing-up from around the house, although Daisy & Emily have a nasty habit of leaving half empty mugs hidden in their rooms festering.

 

All are very good at unpacking the shopping and putting it away.

 

They don't get pocket money but if they're going out or need something they'll be given money. I can see that might have to change as they're getting older though. Daisy and Molly will do things for money but Emily is happy to go without if it means she doesn't have to work

[safneo]

Please excuse any smugness that may come across in this post - it's not intentional, but I am dead proud of my kids

 

Ever since my kids have been in beds, they've been expected to make them. Ever since they could dress themselves, they've done it. Ever since they could make a mess, they've been expected to tidy it up behind themselves.

 

Now: they are responsible for keeping their rooms and computer desks tidy - and they always are; they are about to get back into the swing of washing and drying their own clothes (temporary break in that routine thanks to moving); they don't iron because we don't *do* ironing; they always take their plates, etc out to the sink when they've finished eating; they get their own breakfasts; they always tidy up behind themselves if they've had "messy" toys (Lego, hama beads, etc) out; they always tidy away any unfinished drinks, books, magazines, etc from the lounge at the end of the day; they don't have to do "housework" as such as a rule, but if we need to do a general tidy/clean up then they will always select a fair number of jobs from the list and do them without complaint.

 

For this, they get no pocket money. Well. They get £2 a week each paid into their banks, but that's not as payment for the chores.

 

Jacob is 12. Sophie is 9.

 

They do this because we are a unit. We all have to live here. I don't expect them to tidy up my mess, they don't expect me to tidy up their's. They also know that if they help with the chores on Tidy Up Day then we will be finished quicker and they will have me to play with much quicker than if I have to do it all on my own

 

Sarah, You have every reason to be smug and proud. Thats the thing, its not cleaning up after me, its contributing to the household cleaning and tidying and as for her room, well.................... She won't even clean up her own plate and stuff if she has made herself something to eat. All she has to do is put it in the dishwasher. I get home to a load of mess after a full and hard day at work.

It doesnt help because I have to work full-time now. There is no way we could afford a house and keep the dogs etc if I didn't. She did used to be very tidy, can't remember where it all changed. Her step sister on the other hand is ultra tidy and very clean. He room always looked like a show house when she lived here.

 

Cuts the meat on a Sunday

 

40

 

No But we sometimes go to bed early

 

Sarah, one of my friends has kids that are home educated and they are good at doing chores too When the children were little, they came round to play and she was telling me how good they are at doing chores like washing and stuff and me and my boys were gobsmacked by how good they were. When it was time to go, I said "Right-oh! Tidy up time!" My son Adam said "It's ok, they will do it, they are really good at doing chores"

 

OH is house trained but works very long hours so not really fair to expect him to help out much, though he does often cook and do the gardens and DIY. (and cuts his own meat)

 

Julia, please, please send Adam to live with me. He is so sweet and very amusing

 

So far all the younger kids are putting mine too shame.

Edited April 20, 2008 by safneo

[cycas]

Her room is an absolute pigsty and her clothes are appalling. I refuse to do ironing for her anymore as I used to hand it to her to hang up and it would go straight on the floor and end up back in the washing basket a couple of weeks later. Usually when I had just cleared the last of the washing. I even bought her, her own washing basket to put in her room at her request but that didnt work either. She has been wearing clothes that are creased and crumpled and looks like a tramp

 

Sounds like a perfect description of my sister's room and clothes at around that age. She grew out of it and is now something of a neat freak.

 

My room was always tidy as a teen and I even ironed and dusted, but I grew out of that too.

 

Assuming she's not actually a health hazard, and her mess isn't expanding to the rest of the house, can you not just let her get on with it?

[Brodies Mum]

My daughters are 22 and nearly 20 now, and unfortunately it doesn't get any better. My eldest has been away for a year abroad but when home keeps her bedroom immaculate, and knows where everything is. The youngest daughter has a room that leaves a lot to be desired. At 14 I stopped doing her washing and ironing for the same precise reason that you described. After ironing loads of her clothes they were filed on the floor, you did not know what was dirty or clean. But I must admit when they both leave the house they are smart and clean.

My secret to the bedroom problem is get them to invite girlfriends to stay overnight, usually about every two or three weeks and then abracadbra the room is tidy. Friends opinions are far more important the boring old Mum's. They would dread to think anyone at school thought they were messy.

As far as regular housework goes they neither have time as they are both at uiniversity, but when I eventually get the pitchfork out one of them usually holds the shovel.

Good Luck

Alison

Edited April 20, 2008 by Brodies Mum

[meandmy4?]

I am a bit like dirtychook my eldest who is 13 is old enough to clean his room, make his bed if I am out can make himself something to eat, runs his own baths hangs his washing up. If I am having a spring clean he will help although not entirely volunteraly (sp) If i ask for his help then I do expect it. He gets what he wants bmx's PS3's and money to go out all the time and designer clothes so in return I feel he must help as he is old enough.

 

My youngest is 5 and I now expect him to put his toys away after him and books back on shelf.

[sparkle]

I think it's fairly common knowledge now that Sophie has an absurd love of cleaning - without her no dusting would ever get done here As soon as people realise just how much she loves cleaning, she becomes in very high demand but she won't leave me because I'd "drown in squalor"

Sophie I loves you, I am looking forward to Crufts next year and will leave you lots to tidy

 

My kids do nothing, but they are furry

Edited April 20, 2008 by sparkle

[safneo]

Sounds like a perfect description of my sister's room and clothes at around that age. She grew out of it and is now something of a neat freak.

 

My room was always tidy as a teen and I even ironed and dusted, but I grew out of that too.

 

Assuming she's not actually a health hazard, and her mess isn't expanding to the rest of the house, can you not just let her get on with it?

 

It does expand around the house. I can shut the door on her room but not the rest of the house. And whats in her room ends up everywhere else, like clean washing back in the basket, and her wearing scruffy clothes!

 

My daughters are 22 and nearly 20 now, and unfortunately it doesn't get any better. My eldest has been away for a year abroad but when home keeps her bedroom immaculate, and knows where everything is. The youngest daughter has a room that leaves a lot to be desired. At 14 I stopped doing her washing and ironing for the same precise reason that you described. After ironing loads of her clothes they were filed on the floor, you did not know what was dirty or clean. But I must admit when they both leave the house they are smart and clean.

My secret to the bedroom problem is get them to invite girlfriends to stay overnight, usually about every two or three weeks and then abracadbra the room is tidy. Friends opinions are far more important the boring old Mum's. They would dread to think anyone at school thought they were messy.

As far as regular housework goes they neither have time as they are both at uiniversity, but when I eventually get the pitchfork out one of them usually holds the shovel.

Good Luck

Alison

 

Her friends do stay over occasionally. She doesnt appear embarrased by it as she really doesnt notice when its a mess. And usually they have to sleep in the other room as there isnt room for two of them in her room. There won't be any sleepovers for the foreseeable future though! as for the boy thing, she has already had a boyfriend for 6mths. They just broke up. Didnt seem to bother her (or him) that her clothes were a mess.

 

I have had a chat with my SD too and now I am going to be tougher. I am too soft and let the rules slip too easily, though its hard when she gets home an our and half before me and does most of the damage then

 

Keep the replies coming on what your kids do. I may have to resort to showing her this for comparison.

[nouggatti]

My youngest siblings (i'm the oldest of ten ), live at home (two of them, 15 and 18)

 

Anyway they do washing, ironing, cleaning, clear up after meals, load and unload the dishwasher, help with weekly and daily shopping, set the table, cook meals, clean all of the rooms in the house including the bathroom and their own rooms. They get no pocket money for this, but do get cash when they need it, however they are expected to get a part time job from age 16 on to pay for extras that they want

 

My parents have always been very strict, and any work that is done by my siblings is inspected by my mother to ensure it passes her standards.

 

Believe it or not she has chilled out somewhat in recent years.

[Elaine]

Ro's 10 and does bog all. That's not strictly true - he will help out enthusiastically if I ask him to. There's no point making him 'earn' stuff because his father hands it all to him on a plate anyway When he's with me, he helps sort out the recycling stuff and likes stomping on cans and plastic bottles (must admit I do too). He'll wash dishes (but half floods the kitchen floor in the process), general tidying, dusting - but generally only when I nag a bit. Otherwise he's just cr@p at tidying up after himself (it's genetic, I'm sure).

[lazydaisy]

My daughter is nearly 16, for her pocket money she is supposed to load and unload the dishwasher, fold the non-ironing things and keep her room tidy, plus walk, feed and clean up after her dog. The truth is she has to be nagged to do the dishwasher, her room is a tip (but I just close the door) and she leaves things all over the house. She pinches my slippers and flipflops and never puts them back. She has been doing her own ironing since 13. My son aged 9 is supposed to set and clear the table and keep his own room tidy (ha ha). He is really lazy and can always think of a million reasons for not doing these chores.