Bringing Up Baby Programme On Ch4

[Kaos]

Didn't see the programme and am really quite pleased about that! That woman Truby-wosserface needs a bloody good slap, and maybe some hormone therapy, she sounds like an android, not a human!

 

Couldn't agree more!

I didn't see the programme either (and my neighbours would be pleased I didn't)

 

That said, she may well have a point if she worked with teenagers

The idea of shutting them away, somewhere down the end of the garden (preferably in a soundproof shed), for several months at a time, appeals muchly ATM

 

The 'Continuum Concept' is what I appear to have done with Andrew (though I didn't know it 'til now).

I've always hated the idea of beautiful nurseries, decorated in pink or blue flavours, with frilly bits and expensive furniture.

All a baby wants / needs for the first weeks / months of it's life is to be warm, comfortable, have human contact, and a full belly.

It couldn't care less if it sleeps in a £400 cot, or a spare drawer with some old blankets.

I always felt that baby's sleeping with parents had worked very well for hundreds of years, and for multitudes of cultures. It still does for many thousands of people in third world countries.

Why change something so successful and (in some cases), shove the baby a fair distance away from the person it wants / needs to be close to?

Andrew was born at home, in my bed (the fight to have a home birth is another story)

He slept there every night until he was almost 2 years old, then he had a cot bed (with just one side on), pushed up next to my bed so he had the choice of sleeping with me...or not.

Although he's had his own room from the age of 4, he often came into my bed when he felt the need.

 

He was breast fed (on demand) until he was almost 2yrs. Night feeds were a doddle.

He was never a problem to get to bed - when he was young he slept wherever I was, then went to bed when I did. When he was a toddler, I laid on the bed with him and told him stories, or we talked until he fell asleep.

 

I always had him strapped to me when we went out (sooo much easier than a pushchair, especially when walking the dogs through the woods etc.), when he was tiny, he was on my front and I had a big waterproof jacket which I just zipped up over him. A bit later on, he went on my back.

I used to do housework and stuff this way too.

He was never a problem and always a most contented baby.

Once he was too big to be carried all the time, I would have him sitting on the work top, or wherever, doing stuff with me.

 

I didn't read any books, I just did what seemed natural, and felt right.

I don't think I've 'made the rod for my own back' like my mum, and others from her generation told me I would.

Yes, he can be a bloody pain at times ATM (it's the teenage thing) , but generally, he's a very gentle, and caring lad, and I don't think the world would be a worse place if there were a few more like him ( not that I'm biased of course)

 

Sarah, I was a lone parent right from the beginning (my choice), and I actually feel it was easier than if I had someone else to consider.

It may have been helpful to have had a large network of friends / family to call on, but TBH, I'm not convinced.

I guess it's just whatever you feel comfortable with in the end, but FWIW if I had another baby ( ), I'd do it exactly the same way again.

[mooandboo]

I had no choice other than to have Ceri with me at all times - as far as he was concerned, from birth, I was going nowhere without him (and I loved every minute of it )

 

Kaos, your childcare is almost identical to mine - except that I couldn't keep Ceri in a backpack And I'd do it all again exactly the same way if I had another.

 

MIL took a while but eventually accepted that her *routine* method of childcare wasn't going to happen

[greys mum]

My answer to all the "experts" was and is, Babies can't read, so therefore your manual is null and void!!!!

 

My 4 were all a mix of 60's and the 70's style. What ever suited them best. But they did have a period during the day when they were outside in their prams. (The proper sort!! ). Only time they weren't, was when it was foggy.

 

Go with the flow, happy baby=happy parents.

[dirtychicken]

The thing that struck me most about the information given about the Continuum Concept was how babies fed on demand with such quick access to the breat ensures that mum produces just enough milk for the baby, whereas breastfeeding to a routine can completely knacker up the milk production and make it so much more difficult for both mother and baby.

[scotslass]

My answer to all the "experts" was and is, Babies can't read, so therefore your manual is null and void!!!!

 

My 4 were all a mix of 60's and the 70's style. What ever suited them best. But they did have a period during the day when they were outside in their prams. (The proper sort!! ). Only time they weren't, was when it was foggy.

 

Go with the flow, happy baby=happy parents.

 

My four had the same kind of life. I did have a big old pram, and they did sleep outdoors when the weather was fine (we lived out in the sticks). I never left them to cry, I carried them around, I sat by their beds when they couldn't sleep, and generally put their needs first. After all, I chose to have them and I loved being with them.

 

My mother and others in our family criticised me for my "over-mothering"; my kids would never be self-reliant, apparently. Well, guess what? I have 4 adult children who are independent, loving, responsible, caring human beings. Despite the fact that their father and I later divorced, they tell me they had the best of childhoods. My brother and I, on the other hand, still look back on our own childhoods with regret.

[scotslass]

The thing that struck me most about the information given about the Continuum Concept was how babies fed on demand with such quick access to the breat ensures that mum produces just enough milk for the baby, whereas breastfeeding to a routine can completely knacker up the milk production and make it so much more difficult for both mother and baby.

 

Exactly. Mine were feeding almost constantly at the beginning - they weighed between 9lbs 2oz and 11lbs 3oz - and I am not a big woman! My mother kept telling me they'd wear me out but all that happens is that the milk increases in line with the baby's needs.

 

Even after the birth of my fourth baby (emergency C section after a 15 hour labour), I breast-fed; this time it was the nurses telling me to take it easy. I was more confident by that time, though, and told them I'd manage fine if they'd just leave me alone.

 

Maybe it was partly rebellion against my mother's regime, but I never worried about weaning times, potty-training, sleeping through the night, etc. They did all of those things when the time seemed right for each particular baby.

 

Oh, I am all nostalgic, just remembering what a lovely time it was...

[jackin]

I remember so well when my first baby was born my older sister in law was so bossy about you let babies cry and feed them only at set times I shed tears of fustration as poor david not knowing any better would also tell me off.But stuck to my guns and carried him about in a sling breast feeding him anytime he wanted.I was a bit of a hippy then.

Now a he is a good 40yr father himself and always coming to see us.

The other children born at home and brought up the same way.Although would say that the big old prams were great and mine did spent quite a lot of time outside in garden sleeping or just playing in theirs.It was a much safer world.

[Gemstone]

My first baby was very much fed on demand (bottle fed) but he did snack feed quite a bit and sometimes we fed him when he just needed sleep. My second baby was also fed on demand but I would see if he needed a sleep rather than a feed if he had not long been fed and was crying again.

 

Then along came a book by Gina Ford......

 

It was all about routine and I thought it sounded quite good as I wanted my new baby to fit in around my two other children. When Danny was born, I therefore introduced a bit of a routine so that I knew he would not be hungry on the school run etc and he thrived on it

 

I passed my Gina Ford book on to my SIL. She has stuck to it rigidly with her two children. I have never met two babies that cry as much as hers did I blame myself.

 

Not sure how much you can say openly about Gina though as I believe that she did take one forum to court or something for slagging her off

 

Truby King I can't believe the parents are going along with her at all

Edited October 3, 2007 by Gemstone

[Kats inc]

I've not watched it because it's too much like being at work

 

But TK and stuff like Gina Ford make me want to scream,loudly.It's tantamount to neglect and emotional abuse really.I hate it and think it makes for very unhappy babies and very unhappy Mums.Any Mums I visit with the Gina Ford book I tell them to give it to me so I can take it away and burn it.

 

Cheryl there is nowt wrong with your style of parenting whatsoever so shurrup

[greytgirl]

My son was being fed when he was hungry, I changed him when he needed it, he slept in his cot in my room until he was about one and I then moved him into his own room without any problems whatsoever.

 

 

same here with my daughter, except she was moved to her own room at 6 months..and I would do it all the same again given the chance

[K9Fran]

My adopted sister spent the first 6 weeks of her life in a 'mother and baby' home where the babies were raised using the Truby King concept - and she was a nightmare as a baby!

 

I raised my 3 with Dr Spock, as it felt right for me.

 

As for sharing parents bed - Dave is quite capable of rolling over and sqaushing me, so a wee baby would stand no chance! Besides, I don't like sharing my bed with him, so sharing with a squiggly wiggly baby would be my idea of h*ll!

[owl]

I spent the first eighteen months of my life sleeping either with mum, or between grandparents if mum was on night duty. It was not considered the done thing, but when air raids were happening all childcare routine went out of the window as babies had to be kept handy in case everyone had to dive into the cellar or wherever.

[Allie No Dots]

My second child was born with hip displacia. From a few days old she worn a fabric brace which held her body in a odd position so i couldnt cuddle her properly. When she was around 6 mths the fabric brace was replaced with a hip spica. That is a plaster cast .that started under her arms and went down her trunk and both legs, right to her toes. The only part of my daughter i could touch where her arms neck and head. She had that cast changed every 6 weeks and stayed in it for a year. Holding your child is the most underated, taken for granted thing and anyone who says you shouldnt do it is an ass.

[Happylittlegreensquirrel]

I don't think there is one right way to look after a baby but I do strongly disagree with anyone who says no eye contact is the right way

 

when I breastfed it was on demand , I thought that was the flipping whole point of having milk on tap ( so to speak )

 

I do think routine can be important , things like regular bedtimes worked well for Aisling but I was still flexible so she could adapt to sudden changes in our routine.

[owl]

What this extreme method of child rearing doesn't seem to consider is the importance of language and communication. Babies start to be aware of sounds very early and often understand before they start speaking. It's automatic for mothers to communicate with babies from day one with eye and body contact as well as verbally. I bet no one has done any studies relating the Truby King and similar methods to speech and conversational development later on.