Sillymooo

it doesn't matter how long i stare, i just see the page thats there

very clever picture!

When I was a kid adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious diatribes about how hard things were when they were growing up. What with walking twenty-five miles to school every morning uphill both ways through year 'round blizzards carrying their younger siblings on their backs to their one-room schoolhouse where they maintained a straight-A average despite their full-time after-school job at the local textile mill where they worked for 35 pence an hour just to help keep their family from starving to death! And I remember promising myself that when I grew up there was no way I was going to lay that on kids about how hard I had it and how easy they've got it! But.... Now that I've reached the ripe old age of thirtysomething, I can't help but look around and notice the youth of today. You've got it so easy! I mean, compared to my childhood, you live in a Utopia! And I hate to say it but you kids today don't know how good you've got it! I mean, when I was a kid we didn't have the Internet. If we wanted to know something, we had to go to the library and look it up ourselves! And there was no email! We had to actually write somebody a letter, with a pen! And then you had to walk all the way across the street and put it in the mailbox and it would take like a week to get there! And there were no MP3s or Napsters! If you wanted to steal music, you had to go to the record store and shoplift it yourself! Or, we had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio and the DJ would usually talk over the beginning and mess it all up! You want to hear about hardship? We didn't have fancy stuff like Call Waiting! If you were on the phone and somebody else called, they got a busy signal! And we didn't have fancy Caller ID Boxes either! When the phone rang, you had no idea who it was, it could be your boss, your Mom, a collections agent, you didn't know!!! You just had to pick it up and take your chances, mister! And we didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation videogames with high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had the Atari 2600! With games like "Space Invaders" and "Asteroids"! Your guy was a little square! You had to use your imagination! And there were no multiple levels or screens, it was just one screen forever! And you could never win, the game just kept getting harder and faster until you died! Just like LIFE! When you went to the movie theater, there was no such thing as stadium seating! All the seats were the same height! If a tall guy sat in front of you, you watched his hairstyle! And sure, we had cable television, but back then that was only like 20 channels and there was no onscreen menu! You had to use a little book called a TV Guide to find out what was on! And there was no Cartoon Network! You could only get cartoons on Saturday morning... D'ya hear what I'm saying!?! We had to wait ALL WEEK! That's exactly what I'm talking about! You kids today have got it too easy. You're spoiled! You guys wouldn't last five minutes back in 1984!

CONGRATULATIONS TO ALL THE KIDS WHO WERE BORN IN THE 70's !! First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they carried us. They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a tin, and didn't get tested for diabetes. Then after that trauma, our baby cots were covered with bright colored lead-based paints. We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets, not to mention, the risks we took hitchhiking . As children, we would ride in cars with no seat belts or air bags. Riding in the back of a van - loose - was always great fun. We drank water from the garden hosepipe and NOT from a bottle. We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and NO ONE actually died from this. We ate cakes, white bread and real butter and drank pop with sugar in it, but we weren't overweight because...... WE WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING!! We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on. No one was able to reach us all day - and we were O.K!! We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem . We did not have Playstations, Nintendo's, X-boxes, no video games at all, no 99 channels on cable, no video tape movies, no surround sound, no cell phones and no text messaging, no personal computers, no Internet or Internet chat rooms..........WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and found them! We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no lawsuits from these accidents . We played with worms and mud pies made from dirt, and the worms did not live in us forever. Made up games with sticks and tennis balls and although we were told it would happen, we did not poke out any eyes. We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just yelled for them! Local teams had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn't had to learn to deal with disappointment. Imagine that!! The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law! This generation has produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever! The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas. We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned HOW TO DEAL WITH IT ALL! And YOU are one of them! CONGRATULATIONS!

BLOOMING marvelous

SICK LEAVE Hung Chow calls into work and says, "Hey, I no come work today, I sick, headache, stomach ache, legs hurt, I no come work. "The boss says, "You know something, Hung Chow, I really need you today. When I feel like this, I go to my wife and tell her to give me sex. That makes everything better and I go to work. You try that." Two hours later Hung Chow calls again. "I do what you say, I feel great. I be work soon ..... you got nice house."

i would be extemely interested to see where those statistics were resourced from cos they're blooming hillarious!

As from Jan 2007 Viagra will only be available under its chemical name. Please ask your chemist for 'Mycoxaflopin'

not the same as coffee, but hey ho!

if a dog is found as a stray by the dog warden in newark, they are taken to lincoln RSPCA which is nearly 40 miles away. if your lucky enough to find out that the dog was taken there (they dont inform the police), it costs you £45 a night in kennel costs. they can charge that up til the 7 days runs out, then the dog just has the cost of £110. i know lots of people who have just given up their dog cos a possible £315 to get their pet back is just too much. Boicy who came from Many Tears was registered by them under the name he had when he boarded with them. i have tried to change the details and keep them up to date, but it is proving extremely difficult

i can cope with what anyone says to me, so long as they have an arguement to put forward, not just name calling. no one ever has exactly the same opinion and thats what allows people to offer alternatives to problems. i do have trouble coping with people who just resort to name calling because life isnt as rosy as they hope. without causing offense cos non is ment, there are lots of people out there who go to rescues for their help but then get abusive when such a rescue points out where they've gone wrong! unfortunatly, the same can be said in reverse!

i'm completely shocked by that! i did like the realisation that its deed not the breed. pity we cant get everyone to see it.

my oh is very domesticated. much better at the menial stuff than i am! the only problem is that he often turns up with a ton of coffee or such 'cos its on offer!' then i point out that we probably wont use that much before it goes out of date, and he gives it away to friends! who is really saving money that way??!!

i just wondered if rescues found ex breeding dogs more difficult to rehome that other dogs in the rescue? and does this change depending on the breed of the dog? i would much like to find an older lab to keep mine company as hes turned out to be the best family pet i've ever known. he's such a gentleman! but i know i would be concerned bout taking an ex breeder for fear of future unexpected health problems. its not that i wouldnt be ready to deal with them, its the pain of the dog. they very rarely have the standard of living that 'pets' would have, and that must lead to extra health problems?

waggy

Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says [No, really?] Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers [Now that's taking things a bit far!] Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus? [Do they ever read what they write?] Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over [What a guy!] Miners Refuse to Work after Death [No-good-for-nothing' lazy so-and-sos!] Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant [see if that works any better than a fair trial!] War Dims Hope for Peace [i can see where it might have that effect!] If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile [You think?!] Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures [Who would have thought!] Enfield ( London ) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide [They may be on to something!] Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges [You mean there's something stronger than duct tape?!] Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge He probably IS the battery charge New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group [Weren't they fat enough?!] Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft [That's what he gets for eating those beans!] Kids Make Nutritious Snacks [Taste like chicken?] Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half [Chainsaw Massacre all over again!] Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors [boy, are they tall!] And the winner is.... Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead Did I read that sign right? well they made me giggle!

Love in an elevator _ Aerosmith

Tori Amos

hahahahahahehehehehehahahahahaha

will never look at 5 to 8 the same again!!!!

mmmmmm whats the dogs name???!!!!

garage