flukespad

Braces

Glad it's all coming together for her now

Would rather watch the firemans bott

Dogs love peanut butter so a few nuts wouldn't harm (unless allergic to them) but do watch out as to much salt is not good for your dog.Macadamia nuts should be avoided. Sadly it is thought that most nuts are not good for your dogs health since their high phosporus content is said to lead to bladder stones. Having said that mine love Walnuts & Brazil nuts

complete

Thank you

That was brill was having a really s***t morning and this cheered me up no end

1.Pour cold apple juice on the carpet in several places and walk around barefoot in the dark. 2. Wear a sock to work that has toes shredded by a blender. 3. Immeadiatly upon waking, rush outside in your pyjamas in the rain and the dark and say several times "Be a good puppy, go potty now - hurry up - come on lets go!" 4. Cover all your best suits with dog hair, Dark suits must use white hair, and light suits must use dark hair. Also float some fur in your first cup of coffee in the day. 5. Play "Catch" with a wet tennis ball. 6. Run out in the rain in your bare feet to shut the gate. 7. Tip over a basket of clean laundry; scatter clothing all over the floor. 8. Leave your underwear on the living room floor, because that’s where the dog will drag it anyway. (Especially when you have company) 9. Jump out of your chair shortly before the end of your favorite TV Programme and run to the door shouting "No No! Do that OUTSIDE!" Be sure to miss the end of the programme. 10. Put a little heap of sloppychocolate pudding on the carpet first thing, and don't try and clean it up until you return home from work in the evening and have just stood in it. 11. Gouge the legs of the dining room table several times with a screwdriver - they are going to get chewed anyway. 12. Take a warm and cuddly blanket out of the dryer and immediately wrap it round yourself. This is the feeling you will get when your puppy falls asleep on your lap _________________

The limerick packs laughs anatomical Into space that is quite economical. But the good ones I've seen So seldom are clean - And the clean ones so seldom are comical There was a fat turkey named Sam, Who gobbled whenever he ran. He came out of the bush, Presenting his tush, And was shot up the a**e by a man.

innocent

Run free little one

Hey I'm a sexy sex machine that will rock your world. I said it on another thread so must be true now

Troubled

Lodger

Throat

CLEAN

A group of kindergartners were trying very hard to become accustomed to the first grade. The biggest hurdle they faced was that the teacher insisted on NO baby talk! "You need to use 'Big People' words," she was always reminding them. She asked Chris what he had done over the weekend. "I went to visit my Nana." "No, you went to visit your GRANDMOTHER. Use Big People words!" She then asked Mitchell what he had done. "I took a ride on a choo choo." She said; "No, you took a ride on a TRAIN. You must remember to use Big People words." She then asked little Alec what he had done. "I read a book," he replied. "That's WONDERFUL!" the teacher said. "What book did you read?" Alec thought real hard about it, then puffed out his chest with great pride, and said; "Winnie the S**T."

King

Alien

Happy Birthday AJ