This had me in tears myself, I lost my wonderful collie boy to cancer on 15th December last year. He was like your baby, a nervous rescue who was frightened of his own shadow. I brought him home at 4 mths, he was scared of everything especially children. It took months to get him to go near a child & I thank the local girls who used to sit & let him approach them before tickling under his chin. He was my lifeline through my divorce & my grandad's death.
He was frightened of bumps & bangs and used to run off. It took hours of play with a ball to build his confidence. We'd only just celebrated my 40th birthday & his 11th in Oct last year- 3 days apart. We went to our usual place in Scotland that he loved, peace & quiet gave me a 'normal' dog.
It was only in Nov he didn't eat his tea one day & seemed quiet, from that day the next 3 weeks were a roller coaster. I can only say to have to make that fatefull journey is so difficult, we sat with him whilst he was given morphine & sedative. I know what you went through to sit til the end & I'm sure you're girl like Glenn started the journey in peace & contentment knowing they were loved.
We can beat ourselves up for not knowing there was something wrong- I've done it so many times this last year. But she will find a way to ease your sadness, other people may think I'm crazy but the day after I lost Glenn I found two joined feathers on the path outside. I've come across them since in the weirdest of places.
Take comfort from the fact you gave her your best & her action that day was not usual. She will be happy at the bridge with all our friends who wait for us to join them.x
