Alibullie

To some people dogs are just animals, but to people like us they are so much more, they are our best friends the "people" we think about all the time the "people" we worry about, love, and care for, I can honestly say my Roxy rates along with my OH and children, and higher than any other human in my affection, she's not just a dog, she's part of my life and that means so are her kind, like the dogs in the pound and dogs suffering due to the amnesty. Thats what makes us special people with special friends and you have to feel sorry for the people who dont have that relationship cus they miss out on soo much, well thats my opinion anyway

Well I am confused. Did you know that some doggies dont have mummys and daddys who love them? I know my mummy loves me cus she tells me every day and calls me her bestest ever girl. But I was with her the other day whe she was looking at the Bullies in Need site (what ever that is) and she started crying, she was reading about Cracker who is 11 years old, (which is reeealy old) hes in kennels, but just wants a nice fire to lay beside and a kind hand to stroke him. Hes losing wieght cus of the stress, his owner is also old and has had to go live in a home where Cracker isnt allowed. Then she started reading this, Earlier this year I received an email from Wood Green Animal Shelter in Godmanchester near Cambridge, they had taken in a male Bull Terrier who had been found dumped on the side of a very busy dual carriageway, how he had survived that ordeal alone no-one knew. He was in a terrible terrible state. He was totally emaciated, his eyes were sunken in his head, he was dehydrated and had the most hideous pressure sores on his legs from being kept, presumably, on a hard surface with little or no bedding, and from the holes burned into his legs presumably too in his own urine. He was covered in lumps and bumps and his skin was in an awful state. He was so thin in fact that he could not walk and was close to death. and by the time she got to TY my fur was soaking wet with her crying into it and cuddling me, Ty weighed 13 Kilos, when he was found wandering out on his own he's 2 years old, and had blood test done to test his kidneys as he is very poorly and very hot Ty didnt make it to his forever home he died shortly after he was rescued but at least he knew someone loved him at the end I told my mum that she could use my treat money to buy something from the For The Love of Project, to send to a Bullie who doesnt have a mummy of their own to love them, she bought something and still bought my treats thats how I know my mummy loves me and I love her. Roxy the Bull Terrier

Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in Australia. You should never drink beyond the pint of no return. The frog went unnoticed in the milkshake because it blended so well. Alcohol is a crash diet.

oh that one was just stupid heehee 22 in 29 mins but now I'm stuck,

Hobgoblins make good beer ummmmm

That was so interesting I put it on another forum and almost immediately got a reply with this link also very interesting, go to Holistic Health then click ANIMAL HEALTH – ALLERGIES & VACCINE PROBLEMS http://www.caninecaregroup.net/

A wife decides to take her husband to a strip club for his birthday. They arrive at the club and the doorman says, "Hey, Dave! How ya doin'?" His wife is puzzled and asks if he's been to this club before. "Oh, no," says Dave. "He's on my bowling team." When they are seated, a waitress asks Dave if he'd like his usual and brings over a Budweiser. His wife is becoming increasingly uncomfortable and says,"How did she know that you drink Budweiser?" "She's in the Ladies' Bowling League, honey. We share lanes with them." A stripper then comes over to their table, throws her arms around Dave, and says "Hi Davey. Want your usual table dance, big boy?" Dave's wife, now furious, grabs her purse and storms out of the club. Dave follows and spots her getting into a cab. Before she can slam the door, he jumps in beside her. He tries desperately to explain how the stripper must have mistaken him for someone else, but his wife is having none of it. She is screaming at him at the top of her lungs, calling him every name in the book. The cabby turns his head and says, "Looks like you picked up a real bitch tonight, Dave."

You know you're a dog person when... 1) You own more dog beds, chew toys, collars, leashes, harnesses and crates than you own dogs 2) You meet other dog owners and remember the dogs' callnames after 30 seconds, but can't learn the names of their owners until you've met them two or three times 3) You won't hesitate for a second to share an ice cream cone with your dog 4) Your parents have given up on the hope of grandchildren and have begun to refer to your dogs as "your kids" (bonus points: They refer to them as their grand children) 5) 90 % of your time connected to the internet has to do with dogs (you check what's new when googling for your dog's breed, read mailing lists, check pictures, sounds, in FAQs etc) 6) You have hundreds of pictures on your desktop of your dogs, in your wallet and so on, but not a single one of your family or yourself 7) No one wants to go in the car with you because they'll be covered in dog hairs 8) You put your hand in your pocket to find pocket change - dropping doggie treats and black plastic bags everywhere (bonus points: you've done this in finer company) 9) You've had long and deep discussions with friends about the best way of cutting the dog's claws, but has never gotten a manicure or pedicure in your entire life 10) Books and movies are ruined to you if dog-related details are incorrect 11) The best time of the day is the one you spend with your dog 12) You watch really bad movies just because your dog's breed is found either in a miniscule role or in a 3-second glance over a crowd 13) There are dog hairs on your clothes, even when you've just washed them or they've come back from the dry cleaning 14) The first thing your friends, co-workers and associates ask you when you meet is either "how are the dogs doing?" or "how many dogs do you have now?" 15) The specially ordered christmas cards made from your own photos show your dogs (with or without humans)

A young newlywed couple wanted to join a church. The pastor told them, "We have special requirements for new parishioners. You must abstain from sex for one whole month." The couple agreed and after two-and-a-half weeks returned to the Church. When the Pastor ushers them into his office, the wife is crying and the husband obviously very depressed "You are back so soon... Is there a problem?" the pastor inquired. "We are terribly ashamed to admit that we did not manage to abstain from sex for the required month...." the young man replied sadly. The pastor asked him what happened. "Well, the first week was difficult. However, we managed to abstain through sheer will-power. The second week was terrible, but with the use of prayer, we managed to abstain. However, the third week was unbearable. We tried cold showers, prayer, reading from the Bible.... anything to keep our minds off carnal thoughts. One afternoon, my wife reached for a can of paint and dropped it. When she bent over to pick it up, I was overcome with lust and had my way with her right then and there." admitted the man, shamefacedly. "You understand this means you will not be welcome in our church," stated the pastor. "We know" said the young man, hanging his head. "We're not welcome at Homebase either."

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me." I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!" So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear... "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?" Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep. The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for each outfit." We went on to the jewellery department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier." I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it." Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, "WHAT?" I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?" Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either... but at least that bitch knows I'm smarter than her

SORRY Guys its a jumpy scary screamy joke, There are others that are similar I best not put them on

I shouldent have been drinking a cup of coffee when I was read this its gone everywhere and I'm choking

*** Warning - may not be suitable for children *** How is your mouse control I got to level 3 http://www.winterrowd.com/maze/ Edited - I haven't tried this, but understand it may not be suitable for children, so if you do have children, try it without them in the room first - RA

QUESTION: How many women with PMT does it take to change a light bulb? ANSWER: One! ONLY ONE!!!! And do you know WHY? Because no one else in this house knows HOW to change a light bulb! They don't even know that the bulb is BURNED OUT!! They would sit in the dark for THREE DAYS before they figured it out. And, once they figured it out, they wouldn't be able to find the #&%!* light bulbs despite the fact that they've been in the SAME CABINET for the past 17 YEARS! But if they did, by some miracle of God, actually find them, 2 DAYS LATER, the chair they dragged to stand on to change the STUPID light bulb would STILL BE IN THE SAME SPOT!!!!! AND UNDERNEATH IT WOULD BE THE WRAPPER THE FREAKING LIGHT BULBS CAME IN!!! BECAUSE NO ONE EVER CARRIES OUT THE GARBAGE!!!! IT'S A WONDER WE HAVEN'T ALL SUFFOCATED FROM THE PILES OF GARBAGE THAT ARE A FOOT DEEP THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE HOUSE!! IT WOULD TAKE AN ARMY TO CLEAN THIS PLACE! AND DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON WHO CHANGES THE TOILET PAPER ROLL !! I'm sorry. What was the question?

Geocaching got over 500 now including this one which was really scary