ClazUK

Oops 5 and I'm not even blonde

Gusset *snigger*

Sir

Seamstress

Soldier

Lurchers

Elope

rigging

MARK :o Melon

Baps

socks

Crying with laughter here :lol:

Stocking

Barrier

Sam killed Word Association ;) It's Glist isn't it (the cheapo dishwasher stuff?) Powerball

So sorry Kerri Sleep tight Hobo

Kathy, thank you for the defence but I think I am closer to your age than you might believe The long bloomers seem particularly appealing at the moment as it's blummin cold out in the paddocks. Sam, I will take you up on the kind offer of a paper bag, but could you please ensure it's in animal print? I need to co-ordinate it with my lycra leggings.

Pudding

Dear Aunty Melps, I am terminally depressed due to being a transexual cross between Jackie Stallone and that woman from Cell Block H (and I still can't walk in heels). I already own anti wrinkle cream and have an account at Bon Marche so I think there is little hope for me. Do vets PTS aged trannies and if so, should I opt for the individual cremation with the nice pine box, or just get them to put me in the clinical waste bin? Ooook

Due to my hedonistic lifestyle (and my sick dog), I have had about 8 hours sleep in 2 days. How do I get that 'fresh as a daisy' look back? (It has been missing for about 20 years to be honest....)

Outed as a transvestite and dumped in less than 24 hours..... off to find a tall building to jump off PS: Melp, I have a veeeeeeery fetching photo of you, so watch it :P

Fancy outing me on a public forum I better go break the news to my hubby... and my Tuesday night date...

Melllllllaaneeeeeeeeeee, help meeeeeeeeeeeeeee....... I have a big date on Tuesday night and have bought a new handbag, a posh frock and new shoes. Unfortunately I have not worn heels since we bought the kennels and appear to have forgotten how. Can you please tell me how to look like a laydee in my high heels instead of a bricklayer in drag? Thanking you in anticipation, Ooooooooooooook

Bloody 'ell Rick, you old hippie, I bet those memories are very hazy.... You'll be quoting Gong lyrics next Here's mine: I pictured a rainbow, you held it in your hand I had flashes but... you saw the plan

Dear Aunty MelPs, where can I buy such a product? Aunty Snow, today I have been avoiding small willy sites but I looked at one last night in my face pack and I now have cracks all round my mouth and chin. Is Polyfilla the best product for these? Clazooook