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length of life is not everything fee

i have had several glasses of wine and a mixture of heavy duty painkillers (the pleasures of Endo at certain times of the month). i have moved from being happy to rip anyones head off and spit down their neck to feeling qute mellow really-brings back memories of various festivals Lulu is limping-can find nothing wrong-but someone may be visiting the vet tomorrow-limping grey always makes me think of the worst case scenario.... la la la fee

i walk hounds on my own in the nature reserve at 5 am. i have a grey with no teefs who doesnt bark but will make the odd Woo Woo noise a saluki who is a nelly. the scariest thing is me. i know from experience that if i thought i or the dogs was at risk-i would without second thought be an offensive weapon-which probably isnt saying much as a short, overweight glasses wearing middle aged woman. But i am damned if i will let what ifs change my life fee

im in-i have no shame and the thought of deeply embarrassing yorkshire rugby men warms the cockles of my heart! fee

i dont know if everyone knows yet... cloudy lost Willa tonight her 15 yr old whippet fee

last year was my garden year-and included putting up my greenhouse/fruit bushes/new water butts-and starting on the wilderness that is sort of a flower bed. this year i wont have to keep filling in Moos contribution to recreating the somme so im hoping the lawn will look a bit better. main aim-finish shed enjoy fee

deep south (new orleans, memphis, geogia etc) in April Romania (no jokes about dracula now ) in May california in october-have booked a helicopter flight over the grand canyon fee its going to be a Fabulous year

thinking of you at this tumultuous time. fee

yo da lei he ho. (my yodelling attempt) no chance of catching up. saw sunset boulevard yesterday-OH loved, i hated (i knew it wasnt for me-when i thought of heck grow up you self centred attention seeking ninny) trying to sort out hotels for cloudys birthday (cant tell you what-but its important!) bought her present today-sorely tempted to keep it! saw X hubby: de-furminated his bengal cat and had a real giggle together about old history OH has ordered chinese food, and has cooked fish for the dogs-he is currently esconsed in a book-im off to join him why do they eat better then us??? fee and its stil bloody freexzing! ps Lulu Hound is a complete lunatic: she cant properly bark so Woo Hoos at things-silly thing had a toy so tried to throw toy, give a woo and catch it again before Michael got it-i tell ya as crazy as a box of frogs

seperate bedooms are the neccesity-not the luxury of the shift worker fee

sorry if im sounding like a negative nancy! on the plus side-a couple of the waiters were lovely-i liked the music so a couple of them would put on egyptian music especially for me-and i still have CDs made for me. i did a balloon ride over the valley of the kings-the fact that the pilot was so proud of his insignia-a blue peter badge made it hilarious ( the landing-including the shouting at donkeys to get them out the way! was something else. "No we not die today" was the encouragement i needed!) im not easily intimidated-and im pretty well travelled. But i found Egypt hard graft- being offered the opportunity to give oral sex to soldiers wasnt high on my tourist check list-and trust me i look more like a bouncer then a sex goddess! However-dont let my experience put you off-Egypt truly is one of the wonders of the world.... Fee

brilliant news for the whole family...i am so pleased fee

i did a nile cruise a few years ago-and whilst some of the sights were truly breathtaking-magical. i would never set foot in the place again. i found that within 5 ft of the boat i was a atrget of almost physical violence (pushing, shoving, physically grabbed-i had several people physically try and force me onto horse drawn carriages-i even got trapped by a group of sellers when seperated from OH who would not let me through-) maybe its just me but being surrounded by bored teenagers armed with machine guns (security) did not warm the cockles of my heart. it got to the stage that female passengers alone would not go out......if you were with a bloke it was less-marginally aggressive. Oh and the grafitti suggesting that the infidels go home or burn to death kinda didnt make me feel welcome i also found that having to fight people off All the time-from the bloke that ran off with my case at the airport and refused to return it-till i paid him "a tip" etc to the guide who followed me round a tomb cursing me as i wouldnt pay him to show me round (there were no real guides-just locals who will point at something-and then ask yo for money!)became exhausting. fee

my tips: 1. review your diet-start removing some of the crap and replacing it with something worthwhile (chocolate is gd for the odd down day-but not long term!) 2. cut out the caffeine-its a horrid poison that plays havoc with both mind & body 3. keep exercising-even when you dont want to. Research shows that exercise can be as good as anti depressants in all but the most severe cases 4.sleep more/better -when did you last change the mattess? open the window, get into a sleep routine etc 5. Relax-find 10 mins a day to just me (relaxation is a muscle-use it or lose it) 6. keep a diary 7. think seriously about what is productive in your life-and what is not. A bit like the House Dr-if it aint beautiful and/or useful. Why is it still in your life? are you spending energy/time/emotions in places that are dead? 8. if this feeling is pesistant-talk you your GP. taking anti depressants does not mean you are going to become an extra from the Shining, nor that you have to take them forever-but they can be Very useful 9 think about talking therapies: they can be brilliant but you have to be ready and committed or you will find a lot of crap rising to the surface you were not expecting 10 ring a friend-and talk. if you dont want to do that-see 6. 11. have plans: make decisions. give yourself a goal evry day (even if its empty the bins) so you can then give yourself some well earned praise-you completed a goal you set yourself-and starts challenging some of your thoughts about being a failure-gradually these small goals will increas. lastly-remember this too will pass. fee

my computer-was not well. so i called a man who has fixed her-hence im back on line. But it made me think-im from the generation before computers were taught in schools-and the woefully little i know has all been self taught by trial & error. theres So much i dont get/know /understand. what would you IT persons recommend is the most basic level of knowledge i should attain-and the best way of getting it? ie i thought-if my computer is buggered-how do i set up the new one with my E mail etc? and then i thought-blooming heck-i dont know!!!...and maybe i should any advice for the dinosoar here would be much appreciated! fee

hope all lost dogs get home safe & sound. we had a fantastic extra long walk and met our usual black labs, the chap with the beautiful black GSD and then a black cocker....is it something in the water? we have had lunch and alittle snooze.....parentals coming for tea fee

to those who are remembered and whose loss i still feel. fee

OH braved shops this morning. i have just got home to all cupboards full. He has cleaned the house top to bottom fed dogs and booked us tickets to see the messiah on Good Friday in the Albert Hall. sometimes i dont know how i managed to bag such a sweetie. fee ps he also has a cold-not even man Flu!

note to others who may be tempted. Do NOt-i repeat Do NOT share your sausage & lentil casserole with a toothless greyhound-not only does it get lentils stuck up its nose...but then it farts Agent Orange fee

Hi Peeps-Im Home! the carol concert at the albert hall-was enough to bring a tear to a glass eye. Brilliant music-and nothing like 6k worth of people all singing saw Oliver in the evening-fab. if you have kids-go. Rowan Atkinson is just a perfect fagin...kids are unbelievable and good old Jodie belts em out like a good tough broad. the choreography is outstanding-theres so much stuff on stage in the crowd scenes you dont quite know what to enjoy most!. a sure fire hit fee

lulu is happy & settled well. Michael no longe has the arse that she is here-but is resigned to his fate. family & friends are happy & healthy OH is taking me to see a carol concert in the albert hall followed by seeing Oliver in the west end. we are spending today in covent garden followed by a mooch around the V&A fabulous fee

time-coupled with the dedication of 2 marvellous people=healing & freedom. an inspiration to everyone with a rescue dog Fiona

Glad you & the misses had a good day Fee

i hope your pet lunatic feels better soon.. Fee