boosboss Posted November 24, 2008 Report Share Posted November 24, 2008 A woman was in a coma. She had been in it for months. Nurses were in her room giving her a bed bath. one of them was washing her private area and noticed that there was a slight response on the monitor whenever she touched her there. They tried it again and sure enough, there was definite movement. They went to her husband and explained what happened, telling him, 'As crazy as this sounds, maybe a little '0ral sex' will do the trick & bring her out of the coma.' The husband was sceptical, but they assured him that they would close the curtains for privacy. The husband finally agreed and went into his wife's room. After a few minutes the woman's monitor flat lined, no pulse, no heart rate. The nurses run back into the room. 'What happened!?' they cried. The husband said, 'I'm not sure; maybe she choked.' NEVER ASSUME THAT MEN UNDERSTAND. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- What do you get when you cross an insomniac, a dyslexic, and an agnostic? Someone who sits up all night wondering if there really is a dog. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------- One. How many psychics does it take to change a lightbulb? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Abby Posted November 24, 2008 Report Share Posted November 24, 2008 (edited) at the first one. I have a customer who will LOVE that one ok edited to add, that sounds really dodgy. I wish to clarify this is a PUB customer. Edited November 24, 2008 by Abby Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boosboss Posted November 24, 2008 Author Report Share Posted November 24, 2008 How do you turn a fox into an elephant? Marry It! ------------------------------------------------ A 3-year-old boy examined his testicles while taking a bath. 'Mum', he asked, 'Are these my brains?' 'Not yet,' she replied. ------------------------------------------------- A surrealist walks into a subversive sense of perspective. ------------------------------------------------- Two men in their forties are walking towards each other, both are dragging their right legs. First one nods and says "Falklands, '82." Second one says "Dog s*** next corner." ------------------------------------------------- Q: What's the difference between Gordon Ramsey and a cross country run? A: One is a pant in the country, the other is a... ------------------------------------------------- A man cooks Deer for dinner but won't tell his kids what it is. He gives them a clue "It's what mum calls me sometimes". The little girl cries, " Don't eat it! It's a f**king a@rsehole!" ---------------------------------------------------- What's the difference between a wife, a nymphomaniac, and a hooker? The nympho says, "You're done already?" The hooker says, "Are you done yet?" And the wife says, "Beige, I think I'll paint the ceiling beige." ------------------------------------------------------ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rudi Posted November 24, 2008 Report Share Posted November 24, 2008 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DanishPastry Posted November 25, 2008 Report Share Posted November 25, 2008 :laugh: :laugh: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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