pboae

Thank you!!

In these days of ubiquitous wheelie bins, where can you buy a cheap black bin from? The big ones that go outside, not little flip top things. I can't find them anywhere, it's driving me mad!

Ohhh Mungo, hello again. Any idea what he is crossed with? A St. presumably, but I was wondering about the other half. I love his fluffy head and his spotty nose.

My BiL rented a cottage down there a few years back with their dog. I'll ask him if he has any details of it.

The direct link is here, and this is really just a blatant opportunity to boast 'cos my boy is on the front page at the moment.

But it's the truth, humans can convince themselves of the most improbable things, if they want to believe something enough then nothing will convince them they are wrong. That is one way that partners can fail to see abuse, it's so completely at odds with their world view that it is impossible for them to see it. People always think the crimes they commit are lesser than the crimes other people commit. That goes for speeding motorists right through to murderers, everyone thinks their situation was exceptional and unique. Never undestimate people's ability to distort their world view so they can live with contradictions. I can't explain this very well, maybe someone else here can. Sometimes it can go beyond failing to see what's in front of you, to outright mental illness and delusion, that's a fine line sometimes. But as impossible as it can be to explain or comprehend, and as disgusting and heart wrenching it can be to try and understand it, there are paedophiles that genuinely believe they have a healthy consensual relationship with a child, that even a toddler can flirt with them and initiate a relationship. I'm the first to admit I cannot understand how they can reach that stage, and I am certainly not condoning it or accepting it, but I have to admit they really honestly do believe that, however impossible and revolting it may seem to me. If we don't try to understand how they reach that point, we have no chance at all of intercepting before they get there.

I'm sorry if I upset you Ian, it wasn't my intention. In relation to this: That's what I took you to mean by this: I apologise if I misread what you meant, but to me, that sounds like a personal act of violence. I was trying to show that these things are not as black and white as they seem. To me, the victim's needs have to come first, especially in the case of children, (and note I say needs which may not be the same as what the child wants). If the actions they need to come to terms with what's happened to them are in conflict with what society needs to see justice done, then for me, the child's recovery ought to take priority. To me, the most horrifying thing about child abuse is that it is actually an incredibly mundane and everyday thing, you say that the abuser knows what they are doing wrong and does it anyway, but in fact their behaviour may seem quite trivial to them. It's more likely to be many small daily acts of abuse than one huge headline hitter. In those cases meeting violence with violence is rarely going to be helpful for the victim. And in cases where the child really does have peverse values from their upbringing, it would be reinforcing all those warped ideas that you want to change. That hasn't been the case in the states in USA were they have the death penalty for child abuse or other sex crimes. The offending rates are similar across all states, except that in the ones with the death penalty you are far more likely to find the victim murdered as well. If they are going to the chair for the sex offence anyway, they may as well kill them rather than leave a living witness.

RMF: I am sick of my stupid cold and I can't decide which pics to submit for DNB cos my head is all woolly.

Who wouldn't be? He looks so happy in those pics

Sully gets it in a couple of places, when it flares I always have to clip the fur back and use Fuciderm to get rid of it. I keep a close eye on the areas where it comes and slather aloe vera gel on whenever it looks even slightly red. That seems to be doing the trick and he's not had a bad episode for a while yet. If it's an area he can reach (like on his front leg) then after I put the aloe vera gel on I put anti bacterial powder on to, which stops him licking at it. The powder was from PAH and I think it is just talc really, but it's the only thing I've found to stop him licking it. The aloe vera gel was recommended by someone on here I think, or maybe DP, and I get it from Holland and Barrett.

Violent revenge might make you feel better, but that doesn't mean it will be the best thing for the victim. Most kids are abused by someone close to them, it's incredibly hard for children to come forward as it is, and often they don't even want the abuser punished they just want the abuse to stop. It may be hard to understand, but they may well still love their abuser. As it is some children already carry (inappropriate, but still very real) guilt from believing it is some how their fault when their family is torn apart, what do you think it would do to them if they felt responsible for their death?

Wow Billy, that makes me tired just looking at it! Kiera's ears are just wonderful though.

At least 1 child dies every week at the hands of their carer in this country. Most of those deaths won't even get a paragraph buried deep in the national papers. The sad fact is that child abuse is so common that it isn't even news anymore unless there some extra salacious or unusual details. Most people don't want to hear about it, and they don't want to read about it, so the papers don't cover it. Yet the handful of murders by strangers (10 or less a year) are national or even international news. I don't understand that. To me, a carer killing a child is much more horrifying and tragic than when it's a stranger. I can only assume it is something to do with feeling that it could have been *your* child when a stranger kills them, whereas most people obviously know there child is not at risk from them.

Mandy.... you're not *that* far from Ben Nevis I think it's a great idea Billy, and I would love to sponsor you!

That's great news!

I was out voted so he is currently wearing the pink one, so for now I will save his blue one for best.

I don't think the amount of travelling is stupid, but I wouldn't take a new rescue dog on 5 hour train journey. They are bound to be nervous and skittish which makes them unpredictable and might also upset their tummy*. (*I speak from a horrible experience when I took my old and well travelled dog on a 2 hour train journey, that turned into a 4 hour nightmare, when it broke down and then his colitis unexpectedly flared up. I ended up having to get off the train in the middle of nowhere and phone OH to drive 2 hours to come and collect us).

Sully got his new collars from Anna today, so I thought that merited a mini-fashion show. I let OH pick the trim this time, and Anna did warn me that the one he had picked was very pink, but OH insisted and it most certainly is pink...with hearts on The other dogs are going to tease him when he goes out in that Luckily I didn't trust OH's judgement so I ordered him another one, just in case. and I think it is rather lovely. Then he had some celebratory belly rubs (off OH who still insists the pink collar is fine). and tired himself out with all the excitement

Anna has just dropped Sully's new collars and leads round They are gorgeous, but the pink one which OH picked and Anna warned was very pink, is very very pink indeed. I hope the other dogs don't laugh at him. The one I picked is stunning of course! I may have to post some pics. Edit: I'm so sorry to hear about phoeinx.

I could look at pics of him all day

I left a tenner in a machine once (cos I dropped my purse while I was at the machine and while I was faffing trying to pick stuff up the machine took my cash back again), but I didn't get it back again :-( The bank said the machines don't keep a record of whose money it ate. EDIT: no advice Kazz, but

I've been on some very um... scenic routes with my Tom Tom too Bebe! I don't know anything about videos though, but I want to seeee it!!!!!!

HLGS: I'm going to be buying about £100 worth of Frontline to take to Cuba in May. Would it be possible/cheaper to order it jointly (I can pay you up front obviously)? I mean, would the discount be greater for a larger order?

Oh Kathy, that's brilliant news!

We hire a roofbox when we go away. It's from a place that rents industrial stuff like trailers and car transporters, but they only charge £20 for a week's hire, and that way I don't have to try and find somewhere to store it!