Alison

I've just found out - help me Frisky, what do I doooo?

How kind of you to ask - yes, two sugars please!

Answering "two sugars please" when I hear the words kipper tie is the limit of my fluency I'm afraid

Jo, I'm so sad for you

Many thanks for that Phoebejo-ho-ho, it's brought a smile to many faces today so certainly not a waste by any means The worst thing is that they truly believe themselves to be the only sane people in a mad world Much of their logic can't be argued with either; for example, at "set meal" wedding breakfasts, if there's salad accompanying the starter course, Dad asks the waitress for the sugar dredger. His thinking is that you expend more calories masticating lettuce than you gain from it - "nonsense food" in his opinion. Thus he puts sugar on it to add some calorific value .

Thanks everyone last month for their advice on the topical monthly rhyme for July I did indeed wake up early in order to get in first and my choice was........... Dad laughed fit to bust, shouting it to mum while I was on the phone and particularly liked the unorthodox nature of it (all the more because it was the wrong month) The downside to all this is that I may have just shot myself in the foot and "upped the ante". Watch this space on 1st August! .

I always have fab afternoons coz I'm Sol's sidekick! So glad that you had a fun evening (didn't you have a meal out during the week that turned out to be a better experience than you thought it might be too? ) I hope the coming 7 days are as positive as the last He likes to look his best when he's out and about - let's face it, when you're Sol you never know who you might bump into! I can't tell you how good it is to see you looking so happy and well at last. To quote (well maybe paraphrase) Dog Rescue Lover: "Go Girl!" You're on a roll and long may it continue BTW, what's the difference between a hyoooge nap and a sleep?

Sarah (Dog Rescue Lover) is very clued-up on canine behaviour and gave me some really effective help when Sol had his first "naughty" day a few weeks ago. I was concerned that if left unchecked it might develop into a habit but the advice she gave me has been most useful. Good luck! Edited to say that I think there may well be something in this.

Happy Birthday gorgeous snowflakey teddy-nosed friend Sol and Alison xx

Oh bugger, probably means it will be here too before very long! Happy Birthday to Wingco Mortimer from Sol and me

Right area, wrong hick town - it was Oakham Pure coincidence; he wouldn't have been wearing a coat at all had it not been raining and his blue one just happened to be in my car. Looking at it now, if only I'd let him wear the chunky silver necklace he'd picked out himself to wear this afternoon instead of me insisting on his pearls, his outfit would have matched theirs perfectly It was only on seeing the photos that I realised what a good match his outfit was for theirs, which is presumably why this wildly eccentric couple were so keen to be photographed with him. .

I would like to state unequivocally right here and now for the record that it's the Ginga One who's bonkers, the nutter magnet, NOT ME! I'm just his comedy sidekick Here's another snap from his "abducted by aliens" collection taken this afternoon. Anyone care to caption it?

Yep, clears the mud beautifully thanks Unique is one "compliment" frequently levelled at me that I'm somewhat unsure about, as is highly individual. Heigh ho, better than being a readily pigeonholed dull herd-follower. Your German Sheps are just lovely You must still be feeling the loss of Jo very keenly That's a nice pic of you too BTW - you look like a very kind person and so smart! p.s. - the secret to indulging a hearty appetite without restraint yet remaining skinny is worrying about animals, shovelling plenty of poo and having eccentric parents Edited to say that I don't feel bad about feeding wobbly bits and organ meats to dogs - they not only love them but I think they prefer them and that way I get to eat all the choice cuts without wasting anything then feeling guilty. Would I eat tripe? No. Would Sol fight me for it if I did? Yes. I rest my case.

Sounds like a great new beginning, hope there are plenty more good times coming your way very soon You're in my thoughts - losing the "smalls" is heartbreaking, I know I saw Clazook this morning and she looked healthier and happier than I've ever seen her. Brilliant. Sol's had an interesting and varied day - the following photos were taken within the space of 4 hours this afternoon! NEVER take on an attractive extrovert ginga mutt if you're the shy retiring type or want to walk 10 yards down the street (or anywhere else) without getting accosted............... I have no explanation for the circumstances surrounding the following pic whatsoever. Perhaps they were disabled gentlemen who just like to jazz things up a bit and travel in style? I was too bemused to ask. Set phasers to stun! The oddest thing was, these very obviously flamboyant strangers found the concept of a dog wearing nail varnish so eccentric that they actually asked if they could have their photo taken with him! They were most insistent that I forward it to them by e-mail so I can’t wait to see if they reply. Here he is with his celebrity dog walker and new best friend Clarissa She found herself upstaged by Sol at a country fair we dropped in at on the way back from shopping (and impromptu/bizarre meeting with the Trekkies) and was a real sport about it. Winding down with his Wolfhound girlfriend Shade. She’s got a bit of a crush on him and is openly envious of his pearls! Is he gloating or what?

She does indeed do lots of culinary things but none include the sort of stuff Ikea would put in their meatballs I'm pleased to say. I only partake of things I would eat as a recognisable body part so bovine rectums (or should that be recta?), sheep nostrils and pig eyelids are out however they may be disguised, e.g. meatballs, sausage, burgers, haggis. As a human being, I regard myself as at the pinnacle of the foodchain - unsavoury knobbly wobbly bits are for dawgs Food talk is porn for me, porn of the most sensual exciting kind Unfortunately Scoobs, you might get more than you bargained for if you took me to dinner; I'm the only person I know who has been banned (by more than one establishment) from attending their "all you can eat" buffets on the grounds of eating too much Edited to say utterly spurious, I just have a hearty appetite

Are you toilet trained Scoobs (in a manly way) to the required "Nougatti Gold Standard"? Yes, but my education continues apace as I work with mentally defective profane Sardinians. The latest gem I've added to my lexicon is "mezza sega" which I'm finding disturbingly useful. To give you a clue, my boss told me last Friday that a lorry load of "explosives for hair" would be arriving at the warehouse. I thought (knowing his cr@p command of the English language, and indeed any other) that it would be hairspray. Turned out to be car airbags

I infer from Ditzy's and Doggie Mum's remarks (and indeed your own) that you may be somewhat "easy"

A three part reply as I've not caught up in ages and the message board "Matron" (spoilsport) refuses to allow too many quotes: I'm confused (perpetually and not just on this subject regrettably). Does Scooby (dog) belong to "Doglets" Ian or "Ian" Ian? Or are they one and the same I seek similar in the man department, i.e. one who wears one on his head rather than a button mushroom in his pants (and preferably NOT Y-fronts) - know any such? Where in the world would we meet? I frequent Italy on a regular basis but find Brum somewhat exotic for my tastes, plus there's the language barrier of course

You poor souls, what an frightening and awful morning. I'm sure you'll have a different and more positive perspective when the dust has settled and you feel calmer. Fingers crossed for you Emma - you certainly don't deserve any more to deal with than you've already had on your plate lately

I tried to PM you but you're so popular that your inbox is full! I've been thinking about Issie all week but haven't had much chance to log on an catch up, sorry for that. How is she? I know that the vestibular thing isn't serious but recall all too vivdly how frightening it was. Keeping you both in my thoughts Alison

Head

I heard about this on the radio at work (the Meir Tunnel flood that is, not the transport run!) I felt terrible for those stuck in it. I think you both deserve at least two glasses of wine each

Is that Italy or Philly?

I'm a mere amateur but happy to give it a go if you PM me a few photos to work on. Obviously if you want a proper job you need to go to a proper person

If by any chance it's me, it's due to being dim, unwittingly insensitive and tactless, in which case I'm sorry. I might be a bit daft but I only ever do "malicious" with intention (and usually in style) Have a neurosurgeon friend and a colorectal surgeon pal, both very amusing people who collaborated and developed a surgical technique a couple of years ago to help people with leaky bottom trouble. They approached the patent office and and were told that their techique would be registered provided that they changed the name; they'd wanted to call it "The Smart Arse". (which I thought was a fabulous and perfectly apposite title - another example of political correctness gone mad in my opinion) Boxes are so yesterday Nougatti - it's envelope now! All things are possible with Photoshop Yantan - a "before and after" of my friend Maria that I did for fun a couple of months ago. She loved it.