willowisp Posted October 21, 2011 Report Share Posted October 21, 2011 Hi all, i thought i should tell the Oldies Group of Jess's run to the Bridge. I adopted her from a lovely fosterer called Rose (who ive lost the email of) on the 6th August 2005 when Jess was 10yrs old. I didnt think id have long with her, but she proved everyone wrong. It was with a very heavy heart, and alot of tears, i had to make the decision to let her go. To be free. To be young. To be free from pain. She had suffered from arthritis for a couple of years and although getting a good vets check up in July, she deteriorated so rapidly it broke my heart. We went to the vet, we struggled as it was just me and Jess on 12th October 2011 10.30am The vet had to carry her into the room. I looked at her and i knew. I wasnt going home with her. This was it. my vet gave Jess a sedative and turned the light off in the room, leaving me wrapped around my beautiful girl who i had loved from the day i saw her picture. I told her i loved her. I told her it was ok. I told her she would be free now. No more pain. My girl grew sleepy in my arms, until she fell asleep, knowing, hearing, feeling and seeing me talking, stroking, kissing and cuddling her -that was what she took with her to the bridge. Im still in pieces. She was so so special, and i cant believe shes gone. Of course, im sat here in tears writing this, and its going to be a long time until i can think of Jess without wanting her back here, lying with me on the bed, grumbling, snuffling my hand to stroke her..... Everywhere is so different. No where is the same, shes left a big hole in my house and home. Penny (18mnth black lab) and Max (8yr old Collie) have only just started to seem to come to terms -if that makes sense. Jess was a mother figure to Penny and a friend and older sister to Max. I wish the pain in my heart would stop. I know i made the right decision, but i didnt want to make it. I didnt want to let her go. But i had to. she was starting to be in pain, and i always said when that day came.....ive been expecting it...but nothing prepares you quite like you think until you have to do it. Run free my baby girl, i love you so so much, and i hope i did the right thing and made the right choice, love you always Mummy, Max and Penny xxxx 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whizzie Posted October 22, 2011 Report Share Posted October 22, 2011 I'm so sorry. Reading your moving description & tribute to Jess has brought back all my own very similar feelings on losing Misty & then Jester. I'm sure lots of us understand how you are feeling. Jess was a lucky girl to be so loved & treasured in her later years. In my experience, the pain of loss never leaves you totally but happy memories gradually fill some of the void a beloved dog leaves behind & having other dogs does at least force you to keep going. Take care & thank you for loving Jess x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sanrossscot Posted October 22, 2011 Report Share Posted October 22, 2011 so sorry for your loss, a very moving tribute and a very loved old lady. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommy Bear Posted October 22, 2011 Report Share Posted October 22, 2011 (edited) Tears in my eyes - I feel your loss. Saying goodbye is so hard Edited October 22, 2011 by Mommy Bear Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacobean Posted October 22, 2011 Report Share Posted October 22, 2011 Oh Claire I'm so sorry. It's awful when it's their time to go. Thank you so much for taking her in and giving her a wonderful life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
murtle Posted October 22, 2011 Report Share Posted October 22, 2011 Huge hugs, the hardest decision and not one any of us like to make, but one that we will share the agony of making with you. What a lucky girl to have been loved for so long Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jennyp Posted October 22, 2011 Report Share Posted October 22, 2011 So sorry to hear of your loss. Jess was very fortunate to have had you for the final years. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greygal Posted October 22, 2011 Report Share Posted October 22, 2011 So sorry for your loss. You did the right thing for your precious girl and that is all any of us can do in the end. Fly free little one, happy and healthy once more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gooster Posted October 22, 2011 Report Share Posted October 22, 2011 So sorry, I have tears in my eyes reading this :GroupHug: Run free Jess Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zico's mum Posted October 22, 2011 Report Share Posted October 22, 2011 So very sorry,Jess was so lucky to have known your love,she was obviously a very special dog indeed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
houndzrus Posted October 23, 2011 Report Share Posted October 23, 2011 So sorry :GroupHug: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lil_angel Posted October 23, 2011 Report Share Posted October 23, 2011 Claire Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian Posted October 25, 2011 Report Share Posted October 25, 2011 A moving tribute indeed, I'm so sorry to read of your loss of Jess. May you find comfort in your happy memories & she enjoy herself at the bridge until you meet again. http://www.indigo.org/rainbowbridge_ver2.html Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
willowisp Posted May 1, 2012 Author Report Share Posted May 1, 2012 so 7months later. New home. I know Jess would have loved it here. My back opens up to above a river with ducks and a field opposite with rabbits hopping freely. Is it wrong that i still mourn her? I miss her still. Ok, im not crying while writing this, but if i see pictures of her or little videos taken on the phone...i still fill up. I dont know if i should still be feeling like this...does that make sense? I always knew she was special, but i dont go a day without stopping at her little box filled with her ashes.... Every dog is special in someway, but Jess seemed to have it all, and i just miss her still, just her prescence -lay on the sofa with a soft toy to suckle. This old lady left a deep hole in the home when she went... i hope shes happy....i hope shes waiting for me when my day comes. And until then, i hope she found my nan. She would look after her with joy. sorry...not sure why i felt the need to write this, but i realised i hadnt thanked you all for your words.....so thank you :GroupHug: I live in Ballymena in Northern Ireland now, but i still look at the Oldies Club page and wish i could help. If you do decide to help the oldies over here, be sure to contact me as i would be glad to help in any way i can. Thanks again.....and i know youll probably lean down and give the nearest dog to you a big hug, as im doing to Penny right now, Warm wishes to you and yours from me and mine, here or at the bridge Claire xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yantan Posted May 2, 2012 Report Share Posted May 2, 2012 Claire I lost my George in June last year and I am still grieving. Yes I can now look at photos of him which I couldn't for the first few months but I cannot dwell on them to much otherwise I find myself filling up.I stop at George's box of ashes and say good morning to him every day and again at it's "goodnight sossidge" as I go up to bed. I carry a small amount of his ashes and a curl of his hair in a little capsule on a silver chain round my neck. I feel that way he's always with me. I really don't think there is a time limit to the grieving stage. It's very individual. I just wanted you to know that there's nothing wrong with still feeling upset over the loss of your dear Jess. I do think you are able to cope better with it over the passage of time though, but again there is no set time to this. I am very slowly finding I can talk more about George some days and often smiles come at the memories instead of tears. But I think I shall miss him till my dying day. I am thinking of you and don't forget you can always come on here for a bit of support. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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